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6 Ways Pastors Struggle

Sean Cronin — Mon, 09 Nov 2020 10:00:57 +0000

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6 Ways Pastors Struggle

By Ed Stetzer

When pastors go into ministry, we don’t leave behind all of the struggles that define the human reality in which we live. Like others, we struggle with any number of things each day—interpersonal relationships, our marriages, as parents, with our health, with our self image.

And for some pastors, our struggles can go in one of two directions—either we hide them and try to deal with them in isolation, or we openly share that we, like everyone else, have a lot on our minds.

The unfortunate reality is that too many of us choose the former option. This is not necessarily because we don’t want to share, but because we either don’t know how, or we don’t feel safe. It is not easy to preach a sermon on healthy marriages even as our own is hanging from a thread. Nor is it easy to talk about the impact of sin when we are wrestling ourselves with our own addiction to porn, alcohol, technology…you pick your poison.

As a pastor, let me share six unique ways that pastors struggle. My hope is that this short list will allow both leaders and their congregations the opportunity to begin to ask, “How can we change our situation?”

First, pastors struggle with identity.

Pastors generally have three identities they need to balance: their perceived religious identity, their cultural identity, and their own identity. I remember some years back going over to a neighbor’s house. We didn’t know them well, but they knew I was a pastor. When we first came over to their house, they said it was like Jesus was visiting the house.

Well, I assure you that there is a big difference between Jesus and me! Yet because of my religious identity, this was how they perceived me. It was as though I had some kind of spiritual perfection, which is daunting to try and live up to.

As pastors, we must remind people that we aren’t the people with all the answers—we are simply there to point people to the person who does have all the answers.

Tied into our religious identity is our cultural identity. Pastors are on display, living in a fishbowl which can show the good, the bad, and the ugly. You probably have two to three times the people who attend your church on a weekly basis who are aware of who you are and your church, and they are watching. You know that, and (if you have children) so do they.

Finally, there is our own identity—the person we really are when are alone and when we are with our family.

Second, pastors struggle with community.

How do you get into community with people who either put you too high on a pedestal or watch for your every fault and failure? It is critical to find people, hopefully in your church, hopefully involving your elders and leaders, with whom you can build healthy community.

Sometimes these people are outside of your church, and that’s okay. Sometimes this can be in a cohort of other pastors and leaders. Our accountability and community can also come from church structures like our boards or ecclesiastical structures.

Someone once asked me, “Are you fully disclosed to anyone? Is there anyone to whom you are fully disclosed, other than your wife? If you don’t have that, you probably don’t have that close-knit community.” I personally do have a couple people I am fully disclosed to and a group of people I consider close friends who speak into my life.

Pastoral ministry can sometimes elevate us out of community in a very unhelpful and unhealthy way. So we must be vigilant.

Third, pastors struggle with boundaries.

As pastors, we must remember that we cannot have a deep personal relationship with everyone in the church. We want to shepherd them to the degree that we can. If the church is larger, we will primarily shepherd them through the teaching on Sunday mornings. Or find other creative ways that fill us and utilize our gifts and passions.

But we need to have boundaries and know when to say yes and no. Many pastors feel they’ll be penalized if they say no to anything. We simply can’t say yes to everything. Last week, two students at Dallas Seminary came up to me with a very focused quesiton. They said, “We just got one question for you. How do you tell people that you can’t do things so that you can maintain the boundaries?”

I simply responded with, “I tell them the reason.” A lot of times I’ll say something like, “No, I’m so sorry. I made a commitment to Donna, my wife, that I’m going to be at this.” Or I’ll say, “This is actually the time when I’ve committed to my family.” Or I’ll often say, “I can’t do that and keep up with the other things that I know I have to do, and still be a good husband and a good father.”

Boundaries mean learning to say no. They also mean having healthy relationships. Not every relationship is a deep, abiding relationship.

Fourth, pastors struggle with accountability.

Accountability means different things to different people. If you’re a pastor or a church leader, you are not accountable to everybody. You’re not accountable to the internet. You’re not accountable to Twitter. You’re accountable to your elders.

You’re accountable, if you’re church has congregational polity, to your congregation. In a sense, whether your congregational or not, you’re accountable to your congregation. Where I work, I am accountable to my boss, Margaret Diddams, and to a board, and then to a sub-board. I’m accountable to President Phil Ryken. I’m also accountable to the places where I partner—Moody Radio, Highpoint Church.

I don’t just have accountability, I value it.

But here’s the thing: in an unhealthy world, you’re accountable to everyone. In a healthy world, you have true, submitted accountability to the right people. Again, in a church, if you’re a senior pastor, it is probably to a board and maybe ultimately to your church.

Believe it or not, there’s a real freedom in true accountability.

Fifth, pastors struggle psychologically.

According to a Lifeway Research study, 23 percent of pastors indicated that they had struggled psychologically with 12 percent of pastors saying it was diagnosed (the other 11 saying it was undiagnosed).

Here’s the challenge: you can’t talk about this in a lot of settings. I have a friend who actually lost a job because of mental illness, and he said, “I want to be able to come out of the medicine cabinet, the medicine closet.” There’s this sense that he can’t say, “You know what? I’m taking medication because of depression.”

This is one of the reasons that on Friday, December 6th, we will be gathering together Rick Warren, Ruth Haley Barton, Derwin Gray, a number of counselors, and many others to talk about depression, burnout, mental health issues, and more.

Phil Ryken, President of Wheaton College, is going to talk about how he struggled with suicidal ideation. Pastors struggle psychologically, and to acknowledge that makes a very important difference because that way we can find help and partners in the mental health community.

Finally, pastors struggle spiritually.

As pastors, it can be challenging to be seen and perceived as being the voice of God in a context. I don’t want people to see me that way. Instead, I want them to see me as someone who points to the person who has all the answers.

I, too, struggle spiritually. There are times I’m not faithful in the Word. There are times when I struggle with my prayer life. In those times, I need to share that with people to whom I’m accountable.

If you’re a pastor or a church leader, I want to encourage you to find boundaries, community, and accountability, and a mental health counselor if you need that. We all will struggle, but let’s struggle in accordance with the teachings of the Bible, in community, in accountability, seeking to grow spiritually so as to grow in our own discipleship and our own witness.

Source: 6 Ways Pastors Struggle

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The Discipline of Celebration

Esther Ritchey — Thu, 30 Jul 2020 09:00:00 +0000

By: Courage to Lead

I have a confession.

I am a recovering perfectionist. By nature things are rarely ever “good enough.” I did say I am recovering. I have grown tremendously in this area.

These days I am able to embrace and enjoy the journey more because I have learned to celebrate more.

For most people I know, celebrating wins and enjoying the journey does not come easily. For most of us celebration is a discipline.

Does that describe you? If so, do what I did. Discipline yourself to celebrate. Here’s a system that has helped me grow tremendously in this department:

1. Celebrate Daily.

Every day, first thing in the morning, I reflect on the day before and I write down three things for which I am grateful. To be honest, There are a lot of days I sit there for a while before the celebration begins to flow. Then, all of a sudden, it’s difficult to stop with just three things! Create a system whereby you celebrate the small wins daily. Why daily? For me it’s like exercising. Exercising once a week just makes us sore all over. It never makes us better. Exercising a little each day stretches and trains our muscles to be fit. The same thing happens with daily celebration. It stretches a muscle we all recognize as a need for growth!

2. Celebrate Weekly

Take a chill pill. Rest. Sabbath. Reflect on the week. Stop and smell the roses. Look over the last week and evaluate whether you were just busy or effective? Make adjustments. Remember, traction equals satisfaction. Go back over your Thankful Lists for the last week. If you have been faithful to work the system, and write down three things each day, you now have 21 things you have been thankful for over the last week! It’s been a tough week. There have been some wins and some losses. Our tendency is to focus on the losses. Don’t you do it. Celebrate the wins. Celebration and Depression can not coexist. Drive discouragement away by celebrating!

Celebrate Annually

Retreat. Take some extended time. Set up your email and voice mail auto responses and simply spend a week (or two) enjoying your life. Enjoy your family. Celebrate the accomplishments of the last year. You are not yet where you want to be but thank God you are not where you were! Thank God for how far He has brought you. Now…get focused on the future. Don’t ask God to help you “make it through” the rest of the year. Ask God for some big things. Set new audacious goals! Thank God for surprising You with His blessing before He even does it. No then… don’t you feel better?

Does all of this seem like A LOT?

It actually is a lot. Frankly, it’s too much to do alone. That’s why at CourageToLead we believe, “Every Leader Needs a Coach”…because no leader can do it all alone!

Let’s set up a call with one of our coaches to talk through your own leadership poise and how you’re leading through the realities of this season.

It’s simple, click the button below, schedule a time that works for you, fill out a brief application and show up to your call…we’ll handle the rest!

schedule your call!

The weight you’re carrying is heavy. The burden is broad. You, and every other leader I know, are currently leading through tension, fear and an uncertain future. In a recent podcast episode Shawn personally encourages you out of his heart and gives you a few thoughts on how to lead courageously in this season. Listen to this episode HERE.

talk to a coach

Source: The Discipline of Celebration

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When Depression is Demonic

Sean Cronin — Fri, 27 Dec 2019 10:00:18 +0000

When Depression is Demonic

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by Brandon Cox: As I’ve said in many other places, I’m a huge believer that Christians should approach the subject of depression and mental health holistically. That is, we must consider the medical, spiritual, physical, psychological, and emotional angles. We should see counselors, talk to our doctors, pray, stay in community, etc.

I’ve made the argument quite strongly that depression is not just a spiritual battle. It can stem from trauma, from chemical imbalances, from hereditary conditions, and it can be the result of our reaction to our circumstances.

And… it can also be demonic.

When it comes to spiritual warfare, in which I’m a devout believer, there are two extremes among believers.

Skeptics don’t see anything as spiritual and believe that everything must have a visible, physical, and logical explanation. But when we rule out the possibility of afflictions being spiritual in nature, we essentially become practical atheists.

Superstitious people, on the other hand, see a demon behind every single problem. This can be dangerous when we tell someone with a legitimate struggle with mental illness that their real problem isn’t medical or physical, but they simply need to have the demons exorcised.

As we treat depression holistically, we absolutely must consider the possibility of demonic influence. It’s biblical. Jesus and the early apostles encountered many people who were thought to be insane, but who were merely afflicted or possessed with a demon.

Thankfully, the Bible gives us a simple battle plan. James wrote it this way…

Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

~ James 4:7-10 NIV

If you’re struggling with depression or mental health issues and suspect the problem may be demonic in nature, do this…

Surrender your life entirely to God’s authority. Hold nothing back.
Take a stand against the enemy, resisting temptation.
Stay close to God, pray, read your Bible.
Confess every sin and every potential source of demonic influence in your life.
Renounce any agreement you’ve ever made with any lie or demonic power.
Stay humble, acknowledging your total dependence on God.

If, after all of that, you still feel the same, it’s likely that the source of your depression is not demonic in nature. And now, having done those things, you’ll be far more spiritually mature and wiser as you continue seeking the source.

People are often afraid to consider demonic influence because we’ve seen crazy things on Youtube where a preacher screams and sweats and spits while people convulse on the ground and shriek and faint. Or we have a Hollywood image in our heads with jump scares and spinning heads.

Yes, it’s possible that the rebuking and removal of a demon from someone’s life may seem dramatic, but in nearly every case, it’s simply a matter of submissive prayer and confession, asking for deliverance, and trusting that God has worked powerfully.

And by the way, can a Christian be possessed with a demon? I don’t believe so, at least not in the sense that we often think of possession as some kind of mystical control. It’s more a matter of us leaving the door of our “home” (our soul, our mind) cracked open enough for Satan to influence us and invade our thinking.

You can never go wrong praying, staying close to Jesus, reading his word, and listening to the voice of the Holy Spirit.

God is powerful to deliver you, even from forces you may not understand. So trust him completely.

By the way, I preached a message series on spiritual warfare called For the Win. If you’d like to study further, check it out!

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Source: When Depression is Demonic

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When the Godly Get Depressed

Sean Cronin — Wed, 18 Dec 2019 10:00:21 +0000

When the Godly Get Depressed

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by Brandon Cox: A couple of days ago, I shared this tweet:

Good people get depressed.
Godly people get depressed.

Depression isn’t sin.
It’s a state.

Sometimes it’s circumstantial.
Sometimes it’s spiritual.
Sometimes it’s chemical.

Treat it holistically.

Pray.
Get counseling.
Talk to your doctor.
And never, ever let go of hope!

— Pastor Brandon Cox (@brandonacox) December 15, 2019

And as you can see, it received a lot of reaction.

A couple of weeks ago, I read a tweet from another believer who said, “You don’t need a therapist, you need Jesus.” Her tweet also received a lot of affirmation.

Obviously, we have some confusion in the body, and I strongly and passionately stand on the side of the depressed.

Because I’ve been one. I am one.

A decade ago, I went to see my doctor and she diagnosed me with depression and anxiety and started treating me for it, checking in with me every six months. I also see a Christian therapist who has helped me unlock a lot of doors inside my soul.

As I study the scriptures, I’ve come to believe that discouragement can be sin – when we choose to give into fear and self-pity rather than believing in God’s promises and faithfulness.

But depression is not a sin. It’s a state. It’s a condition.

Depression can be situational, brought on by circumstances. It can be spiritual, resulting from unforgiveness, unconfessed sin, or demonic oppression. It can be chemical, resulting from something unhealthy in the brain. It can be physical, fueled by poor health or other conditions. And it can be mental and emotional, the result of trauma or heredity.

This much I know – depression itself is not sin.

In fact, when you walk through depression, you’re in good company. Charles Spurgeon said this,

I know, perhaps as well as anyone, what depression means, and what it is to feel myself sinking lower and lower. Yet at the worst, when I reach the lowest depths, I have an inward peace which no pain or depression can in the least disturb. Trusting in Jesus Christ my Savior, there is still a blessed quietness in the deep caverns of my soul.

And King David wrote a song about his depression. It included these words…

My tears have been my food day and night,
while people say to me all day long, “Where is your God?”

~ Psalm 42:3 NIV

David couldn’t eat. He couldn’t sleep. And he couldn’t stop crying. Furthermore, people questioned his faith because of his emotional state.

More words…

Why, my soul, are you downcast?
Why so disturbed within me?…
My soul is downcast within me…
Why must I go about mourning…
My bones suffer…

~ Psalm 42:5-6, 9-10 NIV

HIs body was tired. His soul was disturbed. He was downcast. He was depressed.

The church has always struggled with the topic of mental illness. We’ve treated it as a purely spiritual problem. If you just had more faith… If you just prayed more… If you’d repent of sin… If you’d cast out the demon…

Granted, it’s possible to go the other direction – to see depression as purely physical and chemical, to take medication and ignore the need to consider any spiritual cause.

I believe rather strongly that the church absolutely must remove the stigma of depression, create safe places for people who struggle, and encourage people to address depression holistically.

Pray and have faith. Rebuke the enemy. Seek counseling. Talk to your doctor. Stay in community and don’t isolate and withdraw. Lean into Jesus. Rest in his grace. And praise him, even on your worst days.

It’s okay. You’re not alone. You’re not the first to suffer. You’re not the last. You’re not the only one by any means.

Over the next week, I’ll be writing devotionals each day on this topic and diving into some of the tools God has provided for us to fight depression. But for now, know this…

You are loved. You matter. Your life has purpose and meaning. You are gifted. And you are a gift.

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Source: When the Godly Get Depressed

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Can a Pastor Who Struggles with Depression Remain a Pastor?

Sean Cronin — Fri, 20 Sep 2019 09:00:03 +0000

Can a Pastor Who Struggles with Depression Remain a Pastor?

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by Brandon Cox: Charles Spurgeon is considered by most modern evangelicals to be one of the greatest preachers and pastors since the Reformation.

But did you know that Spurgeon struggled with depression? To the point of contemplating suicide?

He said,

I could say with Job, ‘My soul chooseth strangling rather than life.’ I could readily enough have laid violent hands upon myself, to escape from my misery of spirit.

Spurgeon went on to say,

Knowing by most painful experience what deep depression of spirit means, being visited therewith at seasons by no means few or far between, I thought it might be consolatory to some of my brethren if I gave my thoughts thereon, that younger men might not fancy that some strange thing had happened to them when they became for a season possessed by melancholy; and that sadder men might know that one upon whom the sun has shone right joyously did not always walk in the light.

The other day, a popular business man, known among many evangelicals because of his large social media following, proposed that churches should stop this business of allowing people to be pastors while struggling with depression and mental illness.

His post was disgusting.

Would he have fired Spurgeon?

Here’s the thing. Mental illness is NOT a scandal. It’s not some secret sin. It doesn’t disqualify a man or woman from leading, even as a pastor among Jesus’ flock.

It simply makes him human. And further, it gives God’s glory a chance to shine all that much brighter through human weakness and frailty.

I’ve struggled often and openly. Many other pastors I know have as well. If you’re one of them, keep going (unless God’s Spirit warns you to take a break). Keep loving people and allowing God to be strong through you.

And if you struggle with depression, anxiety, or mental illness of any kind – take it to Jesus, daily, as long as you struggle with it. And even when he doesn’t miraculously or instantly heal you of it – even when it goes on for weeks, for months, for years… keep trusting him. Keep hearing his truth.

And keep making the church the safest place on earth for strugglers to gather for hope and healing!

As King David, who most certainly struggled with depression, said, “Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again- my Savior and my God!” (Psalm 42:11 NLT)

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Source: Can a Pastor Who Struggles with Depression Remain a Pastor?

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Mental Health and Our Pastors: The Elephant in the Room

Patrick Bradley — Mon, 08 Oct 2018 09:00:29 +0000

by Ron Edmondson: We were all stunned by the death of Lead Pastor Andrew Stoecklein from California. Pastor Stocklein’s wife wrote an incredible tribute to her husband on her blog and I posted it to my personal Facebook page. The response was overwhelming. I was encouraged by the compassion people shared.

I sensed, though, that Leadership Network needed to also have some sort of response. As an organization, we are all about leadership in the church and growing churches, but we consistently remind ourselves that if we aren’t growing healthy churches, and encouraging healthy church leaders, all of our work will be in vain.

I asked one of our board members, Mindy Caliguire, to put some thoughts together for us. Mindy has a long background serving the church. In 1998 Mindy founded Soul Care, a spiritual formation ministry that exists to increase “soul health” in the body of Christ. She works at the intersection of spiritual formation and leadership. Here are a few words from Mindy:

My passion for leader’s souls began many years ago as I emerged from my own confusing and ultimately life-giving journey of soul recovery amidst ten years planting a church in Boston. My husband suffered greatly as well, and in different ways. My symptoms presented physiologically, but his went deep into the mind as my “golden boy” high-achieving husband could no longer get out of bed, shake fear and paranoia, or control his anger…

The post Mental Health and Our Pastors: The Elephant in the Room appeared first on Leadership Network.

Source: Mental Health and Our Pastors: The Elephant in the Room

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Leadership And Suicide: When Ending It Seems Like the Only Way Out

Patrick Bradley — Tue, 18 Sep 2018 09:00:42 +0000

by Carey Nieuwhof: It’s so hard to write a post like this.

Hard because it’s something that has impacted so many people and it’s so close to so many of our hearts.

As many of you have likely heard, last week Andrew Stoecklein, the pastor of Inland Hills Church, took his own life at age 30 after a battle with anxiety and depression. That’s a picture of Andrew, his wife Kayla, and their boys, above.

I never met Andrew or his family nor have I visited his church, but, like so many of you, I’m devastated for everyone involved. His wife Kayla wrote a moving tribute on her blog, and Andrew’s death made national and international news.

That’s difficult enough, and all of us need to pray for Kayla, their boys, family and church. (And please consider giving to this GoFundMe campaign to help support Kayla and the boys.)

The other reason it’s hard to write this post is because I don’t even like to admit I was there too a number of years ago myself.

My story isn’t a long battle with anxiety and depression per se. The way I got to suicidal thoughts was through burnout. And the worst part of my burnout in the summer of 2006 was a season when I thought that ending it was the most logical and least painful way out.

You know how hard it is to talk about this stuff? I’ll tell you how hard. In my new book I have an entire section on burnout and how to overcome it, but I only gave five paragraphs to my battle with suicidal thoughts. Honestly, I was just too terrified/embarrassed/ashamed to write more.

But today, in light of the widespread dialogue that’s emerged over around Andrew’s passing, I’m going to give it a few more paragraphs, because like many of you, I was so saddened to learn about the suicide of a leader who by every appearances had so much going well: a wife who loved him, three sons, a great church and a future.

Let me say it again before we dive into more words: maybe you’ve thought the only way through your pain is to end your pain. It’s not…

The post Leadership And Suicide: When Ending It Seems Like the Only Way Out appeared first on CareyNieuwhof.com.

Source: Leadership And Suicide: When Ending It Seems Like the Only Way Out

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Depression, Suicide, and the Pastor.

Patrick Bradley — Mon, 17 Sep 2018 09:00:19 +0000

by Peyton Jones: This week Peyton Jones and Pete Mitchell sit down to talk about another very serious topic…Depression, Suicide, and the Pastor. To get straight to listening click here and to download in iTunes click here.

We know this can be an extremely sensitive topic but we feel that it’s one that needs to be brought up. We tend to view our pastors and ministers as people that are impervious to any of the same negative thoughts and ideas that we might experience. We view them as the people we go to when we have trouble so naturally we don’t think they could go through the same things. This just is not the case. Listen in to today’s podcast as we discuss a real like example of this that just happened in Southern California and things you can do to help your Pastor.

Go ahead and click here to listen to this podcast or click here to head on over to the apple store to listen and download this and previous episodes in the Church Planter Podcast series!

Buy Peyton’s newest book “Reaching The Unreached: Becoming Raiders of the Lost Art” over on Amazon.com. You can also download a free chapter and watch a cool trailer for the book HERE or click the image below.

Source: Depression, Suicide, and the Pastor.

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The Best Leaders Are Broken Leaders

Patrick Bradley — Tue, 16 Jan 2018 10:00:21 +0000

Don’t misunderstand. I don’t mean that we’re “broken” in the sense that we’re rendered useless by our imperfections. The opposite is actually true. We’re made more useful, and we discover our greatest purpose through our pain and suffering.

A. W. Tozer is often credited with a quote I’ve shared a few times myself,

It is doubtful whether God can bless a man greatly until He has hurt him deeply.

And without fail, every time I share it, I get pushback and it usually revolves around the idea that God would never hurt us, right? Isn’t his plan for our lives more along the lines of health, wealth, and prosperity?

But consider the context in which Tozer wrote his statement…

We tend to think of Christianity as a painless system by which we can escape the penalty of past sins and attain to heaven at last. The flaming desire to be rid of every unholy thing and to put on the likeness of Christ at any cost is not often found among us. We expect to enter the everlasting kingdom of our Father and to sit down around the table with sages, saints and martyrs; and through the grace of God, maybe we shall; yes, maybe we shall. But for the most of us it could prove at first an embarrassing experience. Ours might be the silence of the untried soldier in the presence of the battle-hardened heroes who have fought the fight and won the victory and who have scars to prove that they were present when the battle was joined.

The devil, things and people being what they are, it is necessary for God to use the hammer, the file and the furnace in His holy work of preparing a saint for true sainthood. It is doubtful whether God can bless a man greatly until He has hurt him deeply.

~ A. W. Tozer, The Root of the Righteous (p. 165).

So it isn’t that God causes evil to come into our lives for no purpose. Rather, it is that he uses the suffering we endure for our good, to prepare and shape our character so that we’re up to the task of leadership.

I happen to be a pastor who struggles with depression. And I’m not alone.

I’ve spent nearly a decade networking with pastors and church leaders all over the world and I never cease to be surprised at the number who, in private conversation, will divulge their own battles with depression and loneliness.

We’re supposed to be strong, right? We have to be the bold leader, the model of victory and spiritual triumph!!

But I’ve learned, after two decades in pastoral ministry, that the best leaders are the broken leaders.

They’ve been hurt and will be hurt more, and they experience God’s healing.

They suffer weakness, and they experience God’s strength.

We often have a certain picture of what depression looks like, but many who struggle do so in between all of the working and parenting and the rest of the busyness of life. Charles Spurgeon struggled with periodic depression while growing one of the greatest churches in Europe.

He led a school for aspiring ministry leaders and compiled the manuscripts of talks he had given to those students called Lectures to My Students, which includes a chapter entitled “The Minister’s Fainting Fits.”

He opens the chapter acknowledging that “Fits of depression overcome the most of us.” So again, you’re never alone in your brokenness – it’s more common than you will ever realize.

He continues…

Even under the economy of redemption it is most clear that we are to endure infirmities, otherwise there were no need of the promised Spirit to help us in them. It is of need be that we are sometimes in heaviness…

We have the treasure of the gospel in earthen vessels, and if there be a flaw in the vessel here and there, let none wonder. Our work, when earnestly undertaken, lays us open to attacks in the direction of depression…

All mental work tends to weary and to depress, for much study is a weariness of the flesh; but ours is more than mental work–it is heart work, the labor of our inmost soul.

And in our common naivety, we often assume that depression is merely the result of sin, or of satanic attack. But Spurgeon points out something very important…

When at last a long-cherished desire is fulfilled, when God has been glorified greatly by our means, and a great triumph achieved, then we are apt to faint. It might be imagined that amid special favors our soul would soar to heights of ecstasy, and rejoice with joy unspeakable, but it is generally the reverse. The; Lord seldom exposes his warriors to the perils of exultation over victory; he knows that few of them can endure such a test, and therefore dashes their cup with bitterness.

In other words, depression often catches us off guard because it follows victory as much as it follows defeat.

That tendency to withdraw, to isolate, to allow the negative thoughts to override truth, can be the result of quite natural causes such as a backlash to the adrenaline rush of passionately preaching to a welcoming crowd or a natural imbalance in the chemicals in our brains.

When I hear a fellow Christian speak about depression as an issue of spiritual warfare that merely requires more faith and prayer, I always say Yes!!! AND… you should also talk to your doctor about possible physical causes and a counselor about the role of past traumatic experiences. Let’s approach the issue holistically.

In other words, sometimes depression can be the result of unconfessed sin. It can also be the result of our circumstances. It may sometimes be satanic oppression. It can simply be the natural low we experience after the emotional high of a victorious moment. And it can also be a physical issue on the same level as diabetes or chronic anemia.

Regardless of the cause, here are three huge lessons I’ve had to learn over the last few years.

Lesson #1: Denying our brokenness doesn’t work for long.

I spent at least a dozen years trying to be the best pastor I could be. I wanted to fit the role, lead well, and if I’m being honest, impress the church and keep everybody happy.

So I wore my suit and my smile and tried to do all the pastor things people expect the pastor to do.

And when criticism came or when conflict arose, I bottled it away so that I could later use it as an excuse to check out mentally and emotionally from real engagement with people.

When Angie and I moved to southern California where I joined the staff as a pastor at Saddleback Church, I was badly broken and I didn’t even know it.

Within the first couple of months of life in our new surroundings, various pressures brought my pain to the surface. Our marriage struggled under the weight of it until a couple of breaking points occurred.

We joined a small group that embraced us, helped us to finally open up about our issues, and encouraged us in our walk.

I also saw our staff counselor, who would provide counseling to any staff member in absolute confidence. Pastor Rick Warren encourages his staff members to seek out counseling without fear or shame, and for the first time, I told a fellow pastor about all of my deepest issues.

I’m convinced God moved us to southern California not simply to help Saddleback minister to leaders in the global church, but also because he wanted us to plant a church but knew I wasn’t ready on a spiritual and emotional level.

When we started Grace Hills Church, we weren’t perfect or completely healed from all of our hurts, but we were absolutely committed to not faking it anymore.

We would start a church as broken leaders, for broken people. It would be a safe place for people to come with their brokenness and find healing and restoration in the good news of Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection!

Denying your brokenness can help you succeed… for a season. But if you want to thrive and become all that God has purposed for you to become, you’ll have to be broken.

Lesson #2: There is healing in the cross of Christ.

Is it possible for God to instantly and miraculously take away all of your brokenness?

Sure. Anything is possible with God. But it isn’t normative. And if you require complete and miraculous healing from God in order to be satisfied with him, you’ll miss out on the joy of coming to know his long, slow process of developing you into Christlike maturity.

Remember that Paul received something greater than a miraculous deliverance from his thorn in the flesh. He was privileged to learn through suffering that God’s grace is enough.

God works patiently with us, like a master artisan, re-shaping us into the masterpiece he knows we can be so that we can show to others the beauty of what his grace can accomplish.

Lesson #3: I lead best when I own my brokenness.

The world’s greatest influencers aren’t merely rich and famous. Those who have the most impact on any generation are leaders acquainted with suffering, who own their brokenness.

Spurgeon continued writing about how God uses our dark nights of the soul to develop us into the effective leaders he desires for us to be…

The scouring of the vessel has fitted it for the Master’s use. Immersion in suffering has preceded the baptism of the Holy Ghost. Fasting gives an appetite for the banquet. The Lord is revealed in the backside of the desert, while his servant keepeth the sheep and waits in solitary awe. The wilderness is the way to Canaan. The low valley leads to the towering mountain. Defeat prepares for victory. The raven is sent forth before the dove. The darkest hour of the night precedes the day-dawn…

Such mature men as some elderly preachers are, could scarcely have been produced if they had not been emptied from vessel to vessel, and made to see their own emptiness and the vanity of all things round about them.

I have a long way to go and a lot to learn. I’m in process, but I’m making progress by the grace of God as I come to understand that it isn’t my strength that brings success or influence. It is actually God’s strength, made perfect in my weaknesses that can profoundly affect the world around me.

To any leader reading this, my greatest encouragement would be to embrace your pain. Own your brokenness. And reach out – to your spouse, a mentor, a counselor, or a close friend.

Victory comes after our momentary defeats, and though grief lasts through the night, joy comes in the morning!

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Source: The Best Leaders Are Broken Leaders

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6 Ways Pastors Struggle

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6 Ways Pastors Struggle

By Ed Stetzer

First, pastors struggle with identity.

Second, pastors struggle with community.

Third, pastors struggle with boundaries.

Fourth, pastors struggle with accountability.

Fifth, pastors struggle psychologically.

Finally, pastors struggle spiritually.

The Discipline of Celebration

1. Celebrate Daily.

2. Celebrate Weekly

Celebrate Annually

When Depression is Demonic

When Depression is Demonic

Wish to Support This Ministry?

When the Godly Get Depressed

When the Godly Get Depressed

Wish to Support This Ministry?

Can a Pastor Who Struggles with Depression Remain a Pastor?

Can a Pastor Who Struggles with Depression Remain a Pastor?

Mental Health and Our Pastors: The Elephant in the Room

Leadership And Suicide: When Ending It Seems Like the Only Way Out

Depression, Suicide, and the Pastor.

The Best Leaders Are Broken Leaders

Lesson #1: Denying our brokenness doesn’t work for long.

Lesson #2: There is healing in the cross of Christ.

Lesson #3: I lead best when I own my brokenness.