by Greg Curtis: Here is a photo of Michelle and I once we made it down the long road to the Church of All Nations in the Garden of Gethsemane. We are standing in front of what is the oldest Olive Tree in the garden, around a thousand years old.

I recently got back from a bucket list trip to Israel. This is the kind of trip you hope you will get to go on someday and pray it doesn’t let you down.

It did not.

People asked me what I was looking forward to seeing the most. I told them I didn’t want to even go there mentally because I suspected that what I was looking forward to might be eclipsed by things I didn’t even know we were going to see.

That is exactly what happened.

One of those surprise locations was discovered when we got off the bus in Jerusalem. We were on a bluff with a fantastic view of the old city. With a guide ahead of us, he got us access to an old stone road, framed in high walls with a steep decline down toward the valley in front of the city. It had security cameras, occasional wood doors that seemed to offer some kind of access to the kind of stone homes you would visualize a scene from the Bible to take place in. Parts were asphalted, some parts not.

Long, uneven, winding and descending, this was the road that Jesus came into Jerusalem on, riding a donkey the Sunday before his execution.

As I descended, I was awed that I was actually walking the road I had seen on flannel graphs in Sunday School growing up so many Palm Sundays. I had no idea this was what we were going to do on this particular day. But as I watched people from all over the world walk this road with me, a couple principles about connecting with people came to mind.

Two principles to keep in mind for connecting people at your church:

I took this photo on the same road that Jesus rode into Jerusalem on. Picture palms and praise happening on this road, but also note how it had no other options but down through the Kidron Valley and up to the Eastern Gate into the Old City. Our connection path for guests to enter into our church community should be as singular and clear as this.

Make your connection path clear and singular.

I was struck by the high walls and the narrow road that formed this old road into Jerusalem. As it exists now, there’s really no escaping it. Once you go through its locked entrance gate, you will walk this road until it reaches its destination, period. Walking downhill like this, it is also difficult to turn back and go uphill against the crowd.

This made me think of a warning I find myself sharing with Sherpa Leaders who want to create engagement pathways for their guests. The warning is this: Don’t offer guests multiple choice. If you do, they will always choose D) None of the above. Like this road into Jerusalem, offer one connection path they can say yes or no to.

We live in an age where we are inundated by information and options. As a result, we are often in a state of decision fatigue. The “Have it your way” Burger King approach to customer service has been replaced by the “In & Out experience”. In California where I live, In & Out Burger pretty much offers just one thing to order. The only choice is whether to make it a double.

People are paying now for information to be distilled into decisions for them due to decision fatigue. Some have their groceries delivered and chosen for them by others via an app. Some now do this with clothing and wine. Others just stay with the tried and true, foregoing a cheaper price at the Costco-type warehouses around them, opting instead for a smaller less overwhelming market where the choices may be more expensive, but fewer and known.

Please hear this: The same is true for your guests this weekend at church. Trust me: they don’t want to hear about your women’s retreat, men’s work day, every kind of small group, and multiple ways to serve and get involved. They just want to connect and in order to do so, they want one option that looks like it will deliver on that. One option that they can say yes or no to. That’s one option. One.

As a leader, this should inform you in multiple scenarios in your entire church, especially when it comes to growing a follower of Jesus: Have only one ask at the end of any event, program, or environment you create. The good news about this is that you get to decide what you want them to say yes or no to. 100 people saying yes to one thing beats 5 groups of 10 saying yes to 5 things. Yes the number of responders are cut in half because people don’t come to church to evaluate choices you lay before them. They are looking for hope, comfort, grace and God…not a menu.

Offering multiple options creates sidewise energy. Having one clear path you point all guests to that they can choose to walk or not allows you and them to put all your energies into that option and the results become exponential.

For example: At my church, we have no info material at our info counter. None. Why? Because the answer to every question (except “Where’s the bathroom?” and “Is there a doctor in the house?”) is “Next Steps” which is our connection pathway. We’ve designed it to answer every question a guest has.

Similarly, at each of the 4 weekly steps of Next Steps, there is only one ask:

Week One: Follow Jesus

Week Two: Join a small group

Week Three: Serve on a ministry team

Week Four: Try a Compassion Project

Leveraging this simplicity, this year (2020) in Next Steps campus wide we have…

Week One: 31% making a decision to follow Jesus

Week Two: 59% sign up for a small group

Week Three: 73% Choose a ministry team to serve on

Week Four: 65% Express interest in a Compassion Project

Some years we have bested that. If we promoted everything at our church with several asks, I believe those responses would be less than half of what they are. So hear me on this. We cannot afford to dilute a guest’s focus, energy and effort. We must decide what is important and build walls on either side of the pathway so that it leads to just one important step, the best step for them as new or growing Christ followers.

On the road that Jesus came into Jerusalem on, there was only one option: down to the valley that leads to the old city. Our connection path for guest should be that simple. Which leads me to the 2nd principle…

Make your connection path simple, not necessarily easy. There’s a difference.

I took this shot shortly after we began descending toward the valley on the Palm Sunday route. That’s Diane with her cain holding the railing that soon disappeared as we made the descent.

Two days before we got on the plane for Israel, I looked down and one of my knees was swollen. I don’t know why. It just puffed up like a blowfish for reasons unknown to me. So armed with a knee brace I bought at CVS, I slid it on and started the paths and narrow stone stairways that are the ancients ways of getting around in Israel.

It hurt when we went down the Palm Sunday route toward Jerusalem, especially due to the decline. But my challenge was nothing compared to a very fun older lady (let’s call her Diane) who due to her age had a walker or a cane for the entire trip. She is in the photo to the right, holding onto the railing, a railing that was only present for a few yards of the long journey down. But we waited for Diane when we needed to, and her family helped her as well. It was a lot more challenging for her than for me.

What made Diane, myself and others struggling with pain continue on this road with enthusiasm despite our issues? The destination. We were headed to the Garden of Gethsemane, an olive grove where Jesus wrestled in prayer and was arrested. So much of our story begins in this grove that wasn’t really a Garden as we would think of it. It was a working farm that produced the olive oil that was fuel for all their lamps and gave light to the city.

Here’s what I want to remind you of: Where your connection path leads allows you to ask more of those walking it. When you are leading them towards an environment they want to experience or even feel a need for, they will do what you ask, even if its not easy.

When we transitioned from a quarterly 7-week connection experience to a 4 week monthly one, there was some vital content that guests found valuable in making a connection with us that could no longer fit. Rather than throw it away, we took a risk. We added 2 additional “Go Deeper” opportunities to the 3 assignments they already get to complete each week at Next Steps. These “Go Deepers” come in the form of 9 to 30 minute long videos with blanks in their books to fill in. I incentivized the completion of them with a swag gift for everyone at the table with the highest percentage of completion, evidenced by all the blanks filled in. When we launched it, I told myself that I would have been thrilled to have 20% to 30% of guest complete them each week. I was shocked to see 80% to 100% complete them (much to the depletion of our swag budget!).

We discovered that guests love investing an extra hour each week in these Go Deepers because they contain some life giving information that helps them in their journey (not a walk through our statement of faith or our church’s position on specific issues). They come back describing their value, many times through tears.

My learning to pass on to you is this: Though your connection path needs to be simple, do not shrink away from tasks or assignments that have real and obvious value to them because if the destination is desirable, they will do it.

Just ask Diane and I. We would both say yes to a challenge that leads to something meaningful. We powered through our bad knees and got to a section of the garden that not everyone gets to see. It was a part cared for by the Franciscans and we were allowed to explore it and find a our own niche in it for a prolonged period of solitary prayer like Jesus did. It was sooooo worth it.

Make sure what you ask of guests is worth it too, even if it’s not easy. They will do it.

This photo is of a small corner of a large section of the Garden of Gethsemane walled off for private prayer. This was why we ignored our swollen knees and kept walking downhill and it was so worth it.

If you were to ask the following people how a guest can connect and get involved at your church, what would they say?

The Senior Pastor

A random staff person

The average church member

A guest

If there are different answers, why is that? Is it…

a) There is no specified way to connect and get involved

b) There are multiple ways for them to connect and get involved

c) There is a specified way but it is not promoted well

d) Other

What needs to happen next in order to have a singular well promoted and effective connection pathway for guests at your church?

a) Have someone meet with our staff this year to form a more effective connection path for our church (click here for my best resource for that)

b) Learn all the necessary ingredients of a successful assimilation strategy so I can evaluate where we are really at (click here for a resource I have for learning this quickly)

c) Get more education and training about what it takes to even have a successful assimilation strategy (click here for my best educational resource)

d) Learn some dos and don’t for effectively promoting your connection pathway. (click here for help with that)

To receive more resources and ideas on connecting people well at your church each month, let me know briefly who you are below:

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Thank you!

Source: Two principals I learned in Jerusalem that will help you connect new people at your church

The post Two principals I learned in Jerusalem that will help you connect new people at your church appeared first on Passion for Planting.

Today’s post is written by Tony Morgan, Founder of The Unstuck Group.

By Tony Morgan:

Nearly every church leader I know is concerned with “closing the back door” at his or her church. But I’ve found the “front door” is usually the bigger issue.

A few years ago, Connexus Church invited me to lead the team through the Unstuck Process.

Carey was in the middle of handing off the lead pastor role to Jeff Brodie, and working through a well-prepared succession plan.

There was a light bulb moment during our time together I can’t get out of my mind. The Connexus team was sharing the number of new guests they were seeing on average, and it became clear:

There weren’t enough.

The church was seeing growth, but not at the pace they wanted.

Jeff said they came into that planning time thinking they had a “back door” problem. One simple metric helped them see it was the opposite:

To see growth, you’ll need more new guests each year than your total average attendance on a Sunday.

To see growth, you’ll need more new guests each year than your total average attendance on a Sunday. -@tonymorganliveClick To Tweet

Jeff says they probably needed twice as many new guests as they were seeing.

The reason this interaction sticks with me isn’t about that metric. I’ve had a similar conversation with many pastors.

It’s about what Jeff and the team at Connexus did next.

They went all-in on becoming a church that’s passionate about seeing their friends, neighbors, and colleagues experience the regeneration and redemption Jesus brings.

Few are willing to do the heart work they did to cast a new vision for loving their neighbor—and a few years later, they’ve seen their number of new guests sky-rocket.

(You can listen to a conversation I had with Jeff about everything they did in Episode 97 of The Unstuck Church Podcast. I’ll go out on a limb and promise that it will inspire you.)

It takes intentionality to reach people outside the church and outside the faith. The natural tendency of every church is to become inward-focused over time.

Does your church have a front door problem? If so, I’d encourage you to process these three questions together with your leadership team.

It takes intentionality to reach people outside the church and outside the faith. -@tonymorganliveClick To Tweet

1. Who should we be reaching?

You need a clear picture in your mind of who in your community God has called you to reach. You may find it helpful to liken this process to becoming an overseas missionary.

Who is in your mission field?

If we entered a foreign land, we would want to determine who is in the region, their needs and then design a ministry strategy to reach those people with the Gospel.

With this in mind, I’d encourage you to engage a conversation with your leadership team to identify who your church should be focused on reaching.

To navigate this conversation, you can ask these key questions:

Who is in our community? Use available demographic information to identify who lives in your region and what trends are shaping your community.
Of those people, who are we trying to reach? How old are they? What’s their spiritual background? What’s their current life stage? You can also gain focus by identifying their primary occupation, ethnicity or education level.
What’s important to them? Put yourselves in their shoes. What are the key questions they’re asking? What are their primary needs? What do they value?
How does our strategy approach address what’s most important to them? Does what your church offers help address these priorities?

This is the same exercise any missionary of Jesus would engage. I’m challenging you to become that missionary in your community.

At The Unstuck Group, we’ve learned that the more clarity churches have about who they are trying to reach, and the more intentionality in ministry strategy churches have to reach them, the more likely the church is to reach a broad cross-section of their community.

The reverse is not true.

When there’s no intentionality or, in some cases, total disregard for who the church should be reaching, the church struggles to reach its community and very few people are saved.

You need a clear picture in your mind of who in your community God has called you to reach. -@tonymorganliveClick To Tweet

2. How do we reach them?

I wish there were an easy answer to that question.

What I’ve learned, though, is that you can’t program your way to health and the ability to reach new people. In other words, starting an evangelism program and conducting evangelism training won’t fix this issue.

Instead, the church must focus its entire ministry strategy on reaching people outside the church and then helping people become disciples of Jesus.

If, for example, you want to reach a diverse group of dechurched, millennial, young adults in your community, then everything you do must reflect that focus.

Your worship services must be designed with that person in mind.
Your discipleship strategy must be designed with that person in mind.
Your nursery environment must be designed with that person in mind.
Your physical space and your online strategy have to be designed with that person in mind.

In other words, you have to become a church for diverse, dechurched, millennial young adults to reach diverse, dechurched, millennial young adults.

You can’t create a program or a separate class or separate worship service, especially if it’s not at a prime-time hour, and expect to reach them. Most people don’t like to be segregated like that.

By the way, I do think a compelling weekend service is critical to reaching whoever you identify in your community.

The primary way people will end up connected to your church is if those in your church invite their friends and family members. Creating compelling environments, including worship services, will help fuel those invites.

The primary way people will end up connected to your church is if those in your church invite their friends and family members. -@tonymorganliveClick To Tweet

3. Are we winning or not?

Let me share some data from Gary McIntosh and Charles Arn in their book What Every Pastor Should Know: 101 Indispensable Rules of Thumb for Leading Your Church. These are some key metrics you can track to determine whether or not you have a healthy front door:

If the church is growing, you’ll need more first-time guests each year than you have people in your total average attendance. In other words, a growing church of 500 will need more than 500 first-time guests in a year.
The typical growing church sees 20% of first-time guests become part of the church.
Growing churches see nearly 40% of second-time guests become part of the church.
Close to 60% of people will become part of the church after their third visit.

As you can see, the odds of someone becoming part of the church increase dramatically if we can encourage them to come back for a second and third visit.

The first thing we should be inviting every first-time guest to do is to come back next Sunday.

The first thing we should be inviting every first-time guest to do is to come back next Sunday. -@tonymorganliveClick To Tweet

One of the reasons why you may have a front-door problem is that you’ve never tracked the number of first-time guests to know if you’re winning or not.

Setting a target and then monitoring your progress will challenge your team to become more intentional about developing a comprehensive strategy for reaching people outside the church and outside the faith.

After getting clear about the front door problem at Connexus Church and rolling out a compelling vision and engaging the congregation, Jeff and team have seen the number of new guests grow by 70% several years in a row.

I talked at length with Jeff in Episode 97 of The Unstuck Church Podcast about the creative approach Connexus took, and he shared a number of books he read and stories of seeing his church come alive as they began investing in relationships with their neighbors like never before.

I encourage you to listen.

That story re-energized our whole team at The Unstuck Group. We love seeing more people encounter the love of Jesus as the Great Commission is carried out through unstuck churches.

First-time guests are just the start

Getting a church growing or helping a church that’s reaching new people grow even further can seem daunting.

It doesn’t have to be.

Whether you’re a church that isn’t growing, has plateaued, or whether you wish your church was growing faster than it is, I’d love to help you break through. That’s why I created the Church Growth Masterclass.

The Church Growth Masterclass is everything I wish I knew about church growth when I got into ministry more than 20 years ago.

The Masterclass includes a complete set of videos that you can play with your team, board or staff, PDF workbooks that will help you tackle the issues you’re facing, and bonus materials that will help you navigate the most pressing issues facing churches that want to reach their cities today.

You can learn more and gain instant access to the course today.

What about your team?

Are you willing to go all-in on becoming a church that treats your community like your mission field?

The post Increasing First-Time Guests: 3 Questions To Expand The Front Door Of Your Church appeared first on CareyNieuwhof.com.

Source: Increasing First-Time Guests: 3 Questions To Expand The Front Door Of Your Church

The post Increasing First-Time Guests: 3 Questions To Expand The Front Door Of Your Church appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Greg Curtis: This is me and my daughter Carly making our ascent toward Castle Rock (in the background) above Big Bear Lake California. As we hiked, bouldered and climbed, I had 5 powerful things illustrated to me as a Connector in a local church. Scroll down this photo journal to see what I learned.

1. Adjust your expectations of people.

Arriving at a new destination on a hike or in life takes effort. This was an almost 3 mile round trip hike through beautiful forest and waterfalls, ascending and descending almost 900 feet in elevation. Not impossible by any means, but not a walk in the park either. I often say that connecting at your church and mine is not a coast….it’s a climb! Recalibrating our expectations for guests in terms of their readiness to connect and the challenges they face in becoming a real part of a spiritual family would do us well.

2. Pace the journey.

We have not trained for this in any way so at this altitude, we had to stop and rest to pace ourselves to actually reach our goal instead of turning back in exhaustion. New people at our church cannot connect to a new group of friends or a ministry role by just attending one event. Our assimilation events are not gondola rides to the top: they are a leg in the journey. Give them multiple opportunities to pace each part of the process of connecting for them so they will actually reach the summit at your church and not give up.

3. Crowds make the journey less enjoyable.

Recently, 200+ people arrived at the summit of Everest….at the same time! It made for an impossible situation up there, after a colossal effort by everyone to reach the top. Can you imagine planning for what happened in this photo? When Carly and I went on this hike, we encountered only 2 small groups of people and one dog in 3 hours of hiking. We were alone together most of the time, enjoying having nature to ourselves. Breaking down your connection classes into table groups instead of rows really makes the difference between a more connectable experience and a less enjoyable one.

4. Detours happen.

Plan for it. We decided to boulder up a waterfall instead of take the trail. It was a blast but I had to use my GPS, walk over a long fallen tree trunk to cross a stream and maneuver through unfamiliar territory to get back on the trail afterward. This photo reveals some almost stairway like stones that led out of a stream to get us around a rock fall. Sometimes our guests will have some life happen and not return your contacts to get them trained for a new role. Sometimes they won’t finish your on-boarding sessions and opt to finish at a later date. Plan for it and know what you will do to leverage that rather than just let them go into the sunset unconnected.

5. You need a guide to help you.

Unfortunately, I forgot my hiking boots and ended up in some tennis shoes that had little grip. When we arrived at Castle Rock, I could only get up part of the way safely leaving Carly to finish alone. She kept trying for 30 minutes or so but had trouble finding the best route alone. Out of nowhere came two guys who were like mountain goats hopping up the Rock. They offered to slow down to include her in their ascent. When she arrived at the top, it was glorious! Do you have table hosts, Greeters, and people in your office who will function as personalized guides to walk people through their connection journey? This is needed and the results will be awesome!

1. Which one of these 5 lessons is the most important one for your church right now? Which one is most important for your team? Which one is most important for you?

2. What is an expectation that you or your church have towards guests that is proving to be unrealistic?

3. What are some ways to pace the journey of connection? At what junctures do you find the biggest need for some space to process or a break to catch their breath?

4. Brainstorm some of the possible detours that guests take in their journey to connect at your church. After listing them, determine a planned response or way of leveraging that detour to help them continue their journey toward connecting in a small group or a ministry team.

5. How can you make your connection experience smaller and less crowded for those making the climb?

6. Where is the most strategic and helpful place you can place a Sherpa Guide to insure guest make a full connection at your church?

Source: 5 practical things I learned on a hike help me connect people better at church

The post 5 practical things I learned on a hike help me connect people better at church appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Greg Curtis: Kendra at one of her favorite places to be: Big Bear Lake California.

If you have three children like I do, you have had the concern for the emotional landscape of your child in the middle. My so-called “middle child” is Kendra. She is now 24.

Kendra was wedged in the birth order between two big personalities. Her older brother Chase is a 7 wing 6 and can absorb most of the attention in any room he walks into with his ridiculous sense of humor. Her little sister Carly (who I wrote about in the post about Fives at your church) was determined to not be left out of anything her siblings where experiencing, especially if it involved her mother.

The pleasant surprise? Kendra never clamored for the attention that her baby sister required or that Chase seemed to attract. She was content being in the background and loved helping create structure for the other two as they “did their thang”.

Kendra grew up helping organize our family nights, going to chef school, and as an adult planning menus and cooking wonderful meals in our home. She loves creating moments and organizing trips for friends whether traveling abroad or over coffee. As an Art Education Major, she leads workshops on calligraphy and watercolor at wineries and boutiques. She continually suggests fun activities that could be on the calendar “once a month” or “annually”. She is kind, funny, loves to serve others, and is slow to advocate for herself or to say anything bad about someone else.

Oh, and about every four months, she reorganizes the garage and rearranges her room.

Why? Because Kendra is a 9 and I could not be more grateful.

How a Type Nine sees their world

A Nine (known as The Peacemaker), see the world as a potentially chaotic place where conflict can easily erupt between otherwise good people.

That’s why Nines are known to…

Kendra and I (She’s the one hiding behind her cup of coffee) on top of a rock we climbed up at Bluff Lake Reserve. She brought the caffeine.

Wear a Cloak of invisibility. Harry Potter is not the only person who possess one. Nines come equipped with one and would prefer to wear it whenever there is conflict and wherever there is someone who enjoys taking the stage.

Take the other side. Nines are known as the “devil’s advocates”, largely due to their desire for people to live at peace with each other. If someone is angry with a particular person, they will instinctively find the upside of that person in an effort to smooth the tension. As you can imagine, that doesn’t always work.

Express their anger through stubbornness. You may remember from the chart on my post on Threes that Nines are surprisingly part of the Anger Triad of the enneagram. Where Eights will express their anger aggressively and Ones express it resentfully, Nines will express it passively through a stubbornness that is unparalleled in any other Type. While agreeing with your input to avoid conflict with you, they will inwardly dig in their heels and remain anchored in their position.

Be optimistic and trusting. In an effort to continually make peace, Nines see the silver lining in every cloud, the upside to every situation, and the best side of even the most negative person. They will explain away (or try to get your help in brainstorming) why and how a person could possibly do/say what they do. All this is an effort to understand them and potentially remove the barb of open conflict in the relationship.

Are out of touch with their emotions. Living outside of their emotions is what helps them keep a peaceful equilibrium both inside and outside themselves. As a result, Nines join Threes in being the last to know how they are doing emotionally. It doesn’t mean that they are flat or expressionless. They can be extremely excited, passionate, or indignant. Just not in ways that will risk dissolving peace between themselves and others.

Create order and contentment wherever they go. Nines have little to no tolerance for confusion or for a vacuum. They will fill the vacuum almost immediately by creating a plan, cleaning up a mess, or charting a new course. They enjoying meaningful routines and do not like changing their way of doing things. This makes them the Type most known for loving the outdoors-embracing the peace, order, consistency, beauty and focus it brings.

As a 9, Kendra not only loves the outdoors, she loves taking others there too. Look at the difference in reaction of the Peace Maker to the lovely bird, and the reaction of her sister Carly who is a 5 (The Investigator).

So how does all this make a Nine feel when they walk into your church this weekend?

How a Nine experiences your church

Nines see your church as an invitation. As people who are prone to the comfort of the back seat, they can be either touched by an invitation to sit in the front seat or intimidated. Nines are people who value their anonymity, but also hope for a comfortable and familiar connection when they experience a church. They inwardly hope to be included, but not in a way that risked upsetting anyones apple cart. They do not usually initiate their own inclusion but look for someone to invite them into community in a non public way.

Dos and Don’ts for for connecting a Type Nine

Do: Personally invite them.

Guests who are Nines have a positive reaction to most personal invitations. Whether through a note, a text or a voicemail, Nines are often touched by someone who reaches out to them individually.

Make these invitations count by being specific and strategic. Invite them to your one program for connecting guests and look for a way to seat them with someone they know to make things feel more familiar.

Don’t: Single them out.

Singling out a Nine in front of others is not an invitation. It’s intimidation. They do not like to be pointed out in front of a group.

This also impacts volunteer placement for Nines.

Kendra sings on our worship team and plays keys. Her biggest challenge can be visibly commanding the stage to lead others in worship when her comfort zone is focusing on the music she is creating. This is how Nines usually operate. Don’ts for volunteer placement include:

Asking them to lead. Peacemakers do not naturally like to take charge of other people as that means plenty of opportunities for conflict.

Asking them to spontaneously do something in front of other people. One of their joys in life comes from serving people through a job well done. For them, this comes through adequate and thoughtful preparation.

Leaving them alone to figure it out. Because clarity and order are part of how Peacemakers insure harmony, they can become paralyzed if you give them a mandate to figure out how they should do something in a new role for them. They want to please and do it well so give them a road map and they will be thrilled.

Onboarding them just before a major change. Wait till the new way of doing things has been determined or the new staff person in charge of the area is in place. It can be very frustrating to change averse Nines to figure out what serves people well only to have it dismantled or to start from scratch with somebody new. Though they may have good input ahead of time, bring them in to serve once the road has been cleared, not before.

So what then is the “Superpower” of a Nine on a volunteer team?

The super power of a Nine on a volunteer team is their ability to create order and harmony. They makes them fantastic team members and assistants. They are effective admins extending their peace through order and process. They are at home with behind the scenes roles but can serve up front with adequate preparation. They are great “welcomers and hospitality people (think customer service here) and love to make a great impression on new people and the people who have been around a long time. They know how to do it too! They are faithful and will serve in the same role for a long time if they a watered a little with appreciation and feel they are part of a consistent team and task.

My observation is that Nines are attracted to the teaching profession . You can see how having your own class of students following the processes and order you have created would appeal to a Nine. The atmosphere of harmony and fun they create is attractive to students of all ages and super important for kids.

Kendra making friends like only a 9 can.

Kendra went to culinary school and excelled, even won awards. Then she went to work at a restaurant. That atmosphere surrounding kitchens is high stress and sometimes contentious. She dropped out of culinary school and pursued worship leading next. Her experience in dealing with musicians, her desire to create order for them and her aversion to conflict made the worship part, not the leading part her sweet spot.

Now she is pursuing a teaching degree to become an Art and English teacher for high school. She has an online business called The Fleur Wreath that has been quite successful as she leads calligraphy and water color workshops at boutiques, wineries, and her studio. She works with all ages, written a short book on how to learn calligraphy, and creates a great environment for budding artists.

Kendra has found her sweet spot professionally and in ministry at our church. Helping a Nine find his or her’s in your church will be well worth the effort.

As I wrap up this enneagram series, look in my upcoming posts in August for this:

5 practical things I learned to connect guest from a hike I went on.

9 ways to minimize attendance drops at your assimilation program if it has multiple sessions.

A cool enneagram resource for your marriage based on you and your spouse’s numbers.

A preview of a new resource I am releasing in the Fall that will include an test to determine the enneagram number of our church, its connect-ability factor to certain types, and a checklist for eliminating your church’s vulnerabilities in connecting with any number.

See you on the climb!

Do you have unmet needs for admin type or organization help during events, programs, or at your office? Do serving in these areas offer a relational environment for Nines to connect with others and feel a sense of belonging?

Having you ever put a super talented Nine in a leadership position? How did it go? What did you learn? What did they learn?

In what ways could you create more personal invitations to serve that a Nine might respond well to at your church?

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Source: How a Type 9 on the Enneagram experiences your church and how to connect them

The post How a Type 9 on the Enneagram experiences your church and how to connect them appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Greg Curtis: Charles and is son Rainier.

As a Three, people who want to kick the tires once the truck is moving, can just be in my way.

Not Charles Stoicu.

Charles can walk into a room and rally people, silently lead people through others he is raising up to lead, assess an event or a process that needs to improve, and speak up in a meeting to point out the elephant in the room.

I have come to appreciate Charles, value his input, and love he and his family in a special way.

Charles came into my life when he was dating a valuable team member. Phylicia Norris was a dynamo on our Build Community Team and her thinking and hard work as lift a mark on us to this day. When she married Charles and had their son Rainier, she left our team to be a full time mom.

I have been mad at Charles ever since!

Charles likes to challenge us. Questions like “Why are we…”, “Why did we…”, and “How will we…” are often asked in a polite but direct and courageous way.

Why does Charles relentlessly ask the hard questions make the tough statements? Because Charles is an Eight.

How a Type Eight sees their world

An Eight sees the world as a wrong that needs to be righted, but not in the same way as a One. Ones are driven to improve situations and systems that are underperforming. Eights see people who are being affected or disenfranchised and are driven to remove what is causing that injustice and boldly replace it with something that will insure it doesn’t happen again.

Charles and his awesome wife, Phylicia.

That’s why an eight are known for these characteristics:

Eights are Challengers. They look around an organization, movement or endeavor and see what is keeping things from happening that would make the most difference for people. They will bring up opposing views, unspoken needs, sacred cows and hidden agendas faster than any other number on the enneagram.

Eights are Bomb droppers. In order for their cause to be served, Eights will often exaggerate a point when they make it, kind of like a cold bucket of water in the face to insure that proper attention is being given to something they see as important. It’s not that they are trying to be deceitful in any way. It is just part of their communication style. They will make statements in church staff meetings like:

“I think we did more harm than good yesterday”

“People won’t find Jesus in an environment where that is allowed to happen”

“There is a disconnect between what we want to accomplish and what we just did”

“I think we just took a big step backwards”

Eights have a soft inside. Many are surprised to find a very sensitive person inside the skin of an Eight. They can be unsure of their value and where they stand in a social circle or network and can feel very affected by that insecurity though you would never know it by their bold actions and courageous positions. Only those who have gained their deep trust will ever know about that softer and sensitive interior.

Eights are Defenders of injustice. It could be easy to see an Eight as a bully. They are not. They defend the ones who are bullied or forgotten. They will take up the cause of an underdog like a super hero does a child sitting on a train track when someone can hear a distant whistle blowing.

Eights are not controlling, they just don’t like to be controlled. This is one of the most profound insights among many that Ian Morgan Cron writes about in his book The Road Back to You. Cron dispels the common notion that the motive of an eight is to always be in control of their environment. It is an Eights desire to not be controlled that is behind most of their actions and they will often take charge to avoid that. As a result, Eights would rather lead than follow any day.

All this makes a guest who is an Eight experience your church in an interesting way…

How Eights experience your church

Eights see your church and mine as a tire to be kicked. Again, not like a One who is inspecting the functionality of systems almost like a engineer would. Eights, what to see if you really mean what you say.

For instance, if you say you are a church for everybody and certain groups of people are being alienated by the unintended consequences of your efforts. you will get some questions and bold statements from an Eight in your assimilation environments. Likewise, if you are boldly addressing issues that have left people and results by the wayside, Eights will champion your cause and invite others into it.

As tire-kickers, they may see themselves or others they know as able to address those issues before they even have the clout to be invited into them. For most, these thoughts represent the conversations going on in their heads that await the right moment when they decide an issue is worth their energy.

Dos and Don’ts for for connecting a Type Eight

Do: Give them a safe place to kick the tires and process their faith.

Challengers challenge. It’s what they do. When they kick the tires on something (sometimes by dropping a “bomb statement”), consider yourself having been kissed by an Eight. They have given you a gift by sharing not only what they see, but their slight exaggeration has exposed an area of their passion and a place of improvement in your ministry.

Rarely will any other number on the Enneagram give you that same gift. So make a safe place for them to share what they see and train Table Hosts and leaders in your church to know how to handle statements that may cause offense, in a non-defensive way.

Don’t: Argue with them, especially in front of other guests.

Taking in their assessments may mean at some point correct wrong information. When that happens, don’t go toe to toe with them, especially in front of others. Especially in front of guests! They are wired to defend a cause and protect someone/something in need so if you are concerned that an incorrect position is energizing their conversations, meet one on one with them and use the Sandwich Technique (Compliment, Critique, Compliment) to honor their secret inner softness. Just don’t spend too long on the opening compliment: they smell a technique coming and to not appreciate mind games. It can potentially make them feel controlled or manipulated.

What is the “Superpower” of an Eight on a volunteer team?

They are advocates. They are the kind you want to take over a ministry for a group of people that have been neglected for some time. They will rally those people, make them believe in themselves as valuable, and will make sure that they are remembered, noticed and embraced by the church at large.

So if you have a segment of your church that needs a ministry “revived” to address their needs (think Young Adults, Seniors, a youth ministry after a difficult transition, etc.), then Eights are your go to at making that happen as they advocate for people, underdogs and causes really well.

However, since we are talking largely about guests and people new to your church, I would caution you about putting them in charge of something under these circumstances:

Before they are ready spiritually.

Before you are ready to have that area fully addressed and resourced.

Before you have won their trust and they have won yours.

Before you have assessed their emotional intelligence in dealing with others.

Charles and some of the young adults and Interns he serves.

Observe their emotional intelligence first because an Eight who hasn’t acquired the EQ to work with and develop other leaders can really upset the apple cart. Try them out in some rolls where you can see them interact with people and when you sense they have the spiritual chops and EQ for leading in your church culture, entrust something important to them and watch it develop into a force to be reckoned with.

I remember Charles volunteering as a greeter when he came to Eastside. Energized by a Seven wing, this Seminary educated and equipped young leader was blowing me away as he interacted with people of every stripe, age, and life stage as they walked through the entrance of our church. Kids looked forward to encountering him at the door. Seniors, loved being welcomed by him. Young families had meaningful conversations with him. But young adults were exceptionally engaged by him.

When the position of Director of Young Adults came open at our church, he was the logical choice and and that ministry has quintupled since he took it on. He is not just their pastor, he is the Advocate for young adults and Young Adult Ministry at my church.

More importantly from my point of view, Charles has been a catalyst for developing young leaders and connect young adults to meaningful areas of ministry. Young adults are table leaders at Next Steps, on the stage leading worship, serving coffee at our cafe, interning in our ministry. The most prolific thing is that from his Young Adult Ministry we call “Ethos” has even come the Campus Pastor of our new Redlands Campus-Matt Feldcamp who I spoke of in the Type One post in this Enneagram series.

It should be no surprise that Charles now leads our Intern Program at Eastside. It has become a well oiled machine for young adults that want to invest in ministry and have others invest in them (something Charles insures we do in a variety of ways).

I am grateful that God led Charles our way and that he is part of our extended family. Look for and out for the Eights who are coming to your church. You will be glad you did.

On a 1 to 5 scale, how well do you work with people who like to challenge you and the status quo? What have you learned about yourself or ministry that caused you to pick that number?

In what area could the leadership of your church benefit from someone kicking the tires right now? Name 3 suspected Eights, at least one that is newer to the church, to focus group with over coffee to help you identify issues surrounding an underperforming area of ministry.

How would you describe the onboarding journey of an Eight from being a first time guest at your church to becoming a key leader in your church’s ministry? What would it look like now? What should it look like in the future?

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Source: How a Type 8 on the Enneagram experiences your church and how to connect them

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by Greg Curtis: Ariel with one of the Chilean families she has fallen in love with.

I was trying to encourage Ariel, one of our Compassion Interns for the year. She was petrified of public speaking and our Compassion Team requires interns to get “up front” experience representing our local and global opportunities to our church’s guests in our Next Step Experience program.

Ariel was responsible for 25 minutes of the session as the Compassion Rep for the day. She came in looking a little stressed but internally being even more anxious. “I get so nervous speaking in front of a group” she said.

After encouraging her privately, she took the stage, and…POP! She got to photos of kids in Mexico and Ariel had a story. She got to a photo of our work in Chile and she had another moving story. She had passion and personal connection to everything she shared. I even had to give her the signal to wrap it up so she didn’t go overtime.

When she was done, there she was surrounded by a group of guests connecting with her and our compassion opportunities in animated conversation.

If you haven’t figured it out yet, Ariel is a Seven.

This is Ariel in the Bubble Run. Think she might be a Seven?

How a Type Seven sees their world

A Seven is also known as an “Enthusiast”. Sevens wear the “party hats” on the Enneagram and add an element of fun to every situation they find themselves in.

As an Enthusiast, Ariel is someone that brings a smile to everyone’s face when she walks in the room. Her excitement to see each person and look them in the eye to cheer them on in what it is they are about that day is almost a spiritual gift.

Seven’s are story tellers, love to laugh, and to be with people. They rally people and point the way toward what they are passionate about. Because they tend to be “big picture people”, details can sometimes elude them. They can also frequently be late to the party, but they bring the party with them nonetheless.

Sevens also have a tendency to cover up pain, particularly from the past. This is part of what can drive them to dwell in the positive, and hopeful side of life, leaving what is unpleasant and unresolved somewhere else. They are drawn towards the happy and hopeful things of life, welcoming their distraction from things that otherwise would make them sad and introspective.

All of this informs their experience of your church whenever and wherever it gathers.

How Sevens experience your church

Fundamentally, Sevens experience your church as a Mixer. Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary defines a mixer as, “a game, stunt, or dance used at a get-together to give members of the group an opportunity to meet one another in a friendly and informal atmosphere”.

This reveals two things about Sevens at your church:

1. They are looking to connect with certain kinds of people

2. They are wanting to have fun, be energized, and get excited about something.

Sevens love to get amped socially, intellectually, emotionally, physically and spiritually. When they do, they will be influencers, inviting others to the source of what has given them new hope and a fresh direction.

Dos and Don’ts for for connecting a Type Seven

Do: Make it fun.

Now is a good time to remind ourselves that we are not a religion or an institution. What we are is a movement that started house to house, meal to meal with large scale gatherings in public spaces by a man who was accused of being a drunk and a friend of sinners (Matthew 11:19). This isn’t to say that Sevens live a particularly sinful lifestyle or that Jesus did. It is to say that like Jesus, Sevens like to have fun and enjoy people.

This is one of the many reasons that at Eastside, we don’t invite people to a class to become part of our church: we invite them into an experience. At our Next Steps Experience, they’ll be a part of fun competitions, grow in their faith through creative assignments, and make friends through meaningful discussion. When they arrive, they are given a backpack for the adventure and are told they will receive a new piece of equipment each week to reinforce the training they will be given.

While most churches connect people by teaching them what the Bible says about connecting, I recommend just creating a fun environment where they actually connect. Read about the 2nd mistake many churches make when assimilating guests to find out more.

That’s what to do. Here’s what not to do.

Don’t: Make them sit with people who would not identify with them or appreciate them.

When you spend time with an Enthusiast (7), you learn that the questions they ask when making decisions about where they spend their time are Who questions, not When or What questions. What matters to Sevens is “who will be there”.

I have also learned that the unspoken question of any new guest at your church and mine is this: “Is there anybody here like me?” That is the question you and I ask subconsciously when we are in any new or strange environment.

That’s why an assistant at the door of Next Steps assigns a table to first-timers (whether there are 2 tables or 8). They seat guests with birds of a feather (mostly by life-stage) so that good connections and conversations can take place over coffee and snacks. Table Hosts are also present armed with questions that unearth things that everyone at the table has in common without being too personal.

The worst way to connect a Seven is to sit them with people they have nothing in common with. Take the time to matchmake…and have fun while you doing it.

This is me, Ariel and Esther (Ariel’s mom) after praying along with many of our staff for Ariel as she left for South America to serve in our movement down there.

What is the “Superpower” of a Seven on a volunteer team?

One of the most common and high-impact roles Enthusiasts take on when they volunteer is that of a Host. This might take the form of:

M.C. at an event.

Welcome and announcements in worship services.

Upfront Host or Table Host at your assimilation program.

Housing or hosting special guests for the church in their home.

One thing I have learned is to not put a teacher in charge of your assimilation program: put a connector. This is where many Sevens shine. To connect guests, you need someone that solicits trust, not just someone with solid doctrine. Check out the 3rd mistake I see churches making when it comes to assimilation to go deeper on this issue.

Ariel went from someone I needed to give a pep talk to, to someone that became my favorite communicator for guests at Next Steps. She has recently finished language school in Costa Rica and has been pouring herself into people that bring her joy in Chile.

I am grateful God made her an Enthusiast. Connect as a many of them as possible as God leads them to you church. You will be glad you did.

In your assimilation environments, do you tend to use grounded teachers and theologians or someone who can rally others with a gift of hospitality?

When guests arrive in your assimilation program, do they have the ability to seat themselves at tables with other people who are similar to them?

What opportunities and relationships exist in your church that can help a Seven actually process their wounds and issues in a safe way when the time comes?

Does your church culture help people who may not be as detail oriented as others or as prompt improve their abilities? Does your church respond with hardline accountability or a spirit of equipping and encouragement to people like that? What kind of approach would you find practical and helpful to successfully challenge a Seven who may need to grow in those areas?

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Source: How a Type 7 on the Enneagram experiences your church and how to connect them

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by Greg Curtis: A Six will ruminate on the worse case scenario until they come up with a plan that is safe and secure for everybody.

It was a Sunday like any Sunday at my church. It was a nice service, met some new families and had some great conversations.

That’s when I heard the sound.

The crunch was unmistakable. It was the sound of metal against metal, plastics against plastics and it had that deafening collision sound that 2 cars make when they have met the hard way.

What I didn’t know was that one of the cars was mine. Yes mine, and my wife was driving it. But the best part was who owned the parked car she ran into: Cindy and Gerry Demint, the first time visitors I had just met.

Nothing like a free gift to exchange for a guests contact info, especially if your One Place to meet guests has just become the church parking lot, complete with onlookers.

I was fortunate in at last two ways. One was that Rhod Marcil, one of our Overseers at the church, owned a dent repair business so he gregariously offered to fix it no cost to either if us. The second was who we hit: we didn’t know it at the time, but this couple who had not yet become followers of Jesus were going to become followers, and cherished life long friends of ours.

Apart from a God who orchestrates such appointments, part of what made this all possible was that Cindy is a Six on the Enneagram.

How a Type Six sees their world

A Six is called most often “The Loyalist”, but sometimes they are listed as “The Skeptic”. They are considered to be the largest demographic on the enneagram, Fours (“The Individualist”) being the most rare.

Sixes see the world as a place fraught with danger. They are rooted deeply in the Fear Triad of the Enneagram and their worse-case scenario thinking and periodic over-vigilance make them known as worriers over those they love. They are hard wired for safety and security and want to know all the details before they commit to something. Their default is suspicion until they know you well and if you ever let them down by choice, lie to them, or do something that put their loved ones in harms way, will then woe be to you. Their North Star is safety and security.

Cindy and Gerry in their backyard where we have enjoyed many a meal over the years.

Sixes are sacrificial. If you are in their family, friendship circle or tribe, their is nothing that will keep them from extending their help or offering their best advise to keep you from risks that can be avoided.

My first interaction with Cindy was not at her first worship service at my church, but in the church office when she came in to ask questions about the camp that her youngest son JT had signed up for. He had been invited by friends to our youth group and he wanted to attend summer camp with them so naturally that activated what I call a Six’s “fear gene”. This is the term I use when talking to Cindy (and to my wife who is a 7 wing 6) and I am referring to a natural life long tendency to see the danger in things before almost anything else. Fortunately, our church and camp passed the test and JT and his brother Peter went to camp.

Cindy and Gerry have 4 children who are all adults now: Tim, Mandy, Peter and JT. After becoming part of our church and hosting a small group, a defining moment happened in their family. It was discovered that a degenerative disease of the nervous system called “Ataxia” that is genetically inherited through the unique combining of the parents genes was in fact the new reality for all 3 of their teen sons. Confining them to wheelchairs over time, Ataxia has similar symptoms to Lou Gerhig’s disease.

As a Six, Cindy has been not just Mother of the Century in my book, she has become a force to be reckoned with in raising awareness and money for research to fight Ataxia. Sixes can find alternative ways, safer ways to accomplish tasks. They are fantastic problem solvers when it comes to risk assessment. As a result, Cindy’s home has been redesigned to give comfort and access to her 3 adult sons. Whenever Cindy and Gerry fly on a plane, they take two flights to ensure that nothing will happen to both parents when their sons will need at least one in their lives.

I would also call a Loyalist an Activist in the sense that if someone needs help whom they love, heaven and earth will be moved to see that they will be safe and well. Our church had and continues to have the privilege of supporting her annual Walk and Roll in Long Beach and Yorba Linda, Brothers on a Quest campaign, and even the premier of a movie made about the Demint family. Cindy serves on the National Ataxia Board and this lady and her husband Gerry still find time to go and support the ministries of our church in other countries and to show up at events for my own kids who see them as a spiritual aunt and uncle.

How Sixes experience your church

It should be no surprise that Sixes see your church as a resource. This sounds like they are takers. Nothing could be farther from the truth. They experience a spiritual family as a network of resources that can be used to bless those both inside and outside that network.

Dos and Don’ts for for connecting a Type Six

Do: Be there for their family and friends in need

One of the high honors I’ve had in my life is baptizing Gerry Demint in the Colorado River at a Men’s River Trip. I love telling him that I didn’t hold him under long enough.

Eventually, almost every family member and close friend of the Demints have attended our church. Because of Ataxia, when their sons attend Christmas services along with their grandparents. we invite them to come early and be escorted into the auditorium first along with others who have any special needs. They are seated in an area where there is space for wheelchairs next to seating for their family and friends. There are individual TV screens for the visually impaired and auditorium hosts who check in to see if they need anything from blankets they can keep if they’d like, to coloring books for kids.

When a church takes care of the special needs of a Six’s family and friends, you are speaking the native language of a Loyalist which leads to an obvious Don’t…

Don’t: Make them do something that would make their friends and family uncomfortable

Sixes may ask you to do things that would help their loved ones connect to God, others or resources that might be unprecedented or even against some rules or policies. Find a way to accommodate them. They are not asking for themselves but for those they care about and hoping to help or lead to faith.

When we do things just because its our policy or its the way we’ve always done it, that breaks trust with a Six if our inflexibility makes their guests uncomfortable in some real way. Being as creative as they are in problem solving would go along way a connecting a Six at your church.

What is the “Superpower” of a Six on a volunteer team?

Sixes become brokers when they volunteer. Because they are loyal to their tribe, anyone in that tribe who is in need of anything-encouragement, financial help, expertise, whatever-will be the beneficiary of a Six matching their needs to your church’s resources.

As a leader, another role that I have personally benefitted from that Sixes regularly take on is that of a consultant. Their natural gravitation toward risk assessment, seeking the safest option, and knowing how the people they love will experience something will eliminate missteps that you couldn’t see otherwise in ministry planning.

One example of this is Olivia Woodward who is on the staff team of one of our campuses. She is invaluable in advocating the safety, comfortability and skepticism that the average guest may have. Her insulating our ministry from avoidable mishaps in volunteer onboarding and communication from the stage has been a gift to our team. All this because she is a Six! See Olivia’s photo on my post on How the Enneagram can help you reach a bigger variety of guests at your church.

As time as gone on, I realize how my life has been impacted and insulated by the presence of Sixes. My grandmother was a SIx. My wife and my son are wing Sixes. Cindy Demint is a Six that affects the lives of people surrounding her in transforming ways.

JT’s Wedding. Not a dry eye in the house.

This year, Cindy’s son JT got married. This is something that we didn’t know would be in the cards for her son but Super Six Cindy made it happen. We had to navigate a lot of conventionality and rules to make it happen, but Cindy has taught me that love does that.

I still get tears in my eyes when I remember the mother/son dance. JT decided to have his sister help lift him out of his wheelchair and stand behind him so he could truly dance with his mom. I know. Killer…

I have known JT since he was in Jr High before Ataxia was a part of his life. I was honored to help officiate at his wedding and his beautiful wife Miriam driven largely by a family who is heavily influenced by the energy of their Six Matriarch. We are all blessed because of her.

What she has done for her sons is astounding and that I get to be a part of that in any way is an honor and a gift as a Christ follower for me.

So connect those Sixes! You will be glad you did.

What concessions or unique opportunities do you have for people with special needs or for elderly guests?

What are the bumpers or guard rails for going off-script when it comes to addressing the unique needs and desires of guests? How do your volunteer teams who serve guests know these boundaries? Are they given permission and even inspired to go off script to wow a guest?

Is there a cautionary Six who you could bring into brainstorming conversations on topics that impact guest experience? Who is it? Email them now!

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Source: How a Type 6 on the Enneagram experiences your church and how to connect them

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By Greg Curtis: Nathan was a high schooler when I first met him in Next Steps. He was such a great guy, easy to talk with and helpful beyond belief. I began to think that his helpfulness came from the fact that he grew up as the oldest of 8 children. I was wrong.

Nathan was a Helper because he was a 2.

Nathan and I at a Compassion event at “The Farm” in Anaheim.

I have known many a firstborn without that helpful spirit. Nathan outshines them all in the help department. As a high school graduate at 18 years of age, he become my youngest Table Host at our assimilation events, volunteering for the job so that he could include other teens and young adults in our connection environment. He wanted to see all of them get plugged into a small group and a ministry team. He knew what happened in his life when he was allowed to serve in the ministry for guests I was hosting at the time (I can’t even say invited….it was his idea) and he wanted all his friends to have that same opportunity.

There was no task too small for Nathan. If it would help you or the ministry to get it done, he was your man. Half the time you didn’t even need to ask-he just did it and was happy to. Nathan easily became a go to person for our Jr High and Kidside ministries. He even learned how to play the guitar and lead worship when we were short on worship leaders in Jr high for a time. You could not pay me to learn an instrument and stand on stage in front of everyone and sing to fill a need like that.

Nathan didn’t need to be paid. It energized him just to help.

How do these awesome people see the world? Twos on the Enneagram see their environments as a potentially fearful unloving place, fraught with the possibility of relational loss or emotional chaos. Twos see themselves as the Helper, the ones who can create relational stability, emotional equilibrium, and order where they may be a sense of chaos.

Helpers like these are highly motivated to change the spiritual and relational temperature of any room they find themselves in through serving others, making other people feel noticed and secure. They look into your eyes to discern if you are “OK” and if your not, they make it their personal mission to make sure you will be. At least they want you to feel that way.

What Twos inwardly struggle with is the desire for someone to do that for them. They secretly want others to love them in the same way they are showing love to others. When that doesn’t happen, they may get withdrawn, introspective, or pull away. They could also get demanding and a little vindictive. It just isn’t right in the mind of a two to give so wholeheartedly and have it continually go unreturned, taken for granted, or to then be taken advantage of by self absorbed people.

This is just a thumbnail sketch of a Two. By this description, many of you reading may emotionally relate to the Helper profile or see your own commitment to serving and helping others and say to yourself, “Hey, I’m a Two!”. But don’t be so fast: Twos are the number one false diagnosis among Christians and among women when it comes to the Enneagram. For obvious reasons, Christians and woman are trained by most churches and sometimes our culture at large to be servants and to be helpful. That doesn’t mean you are a Two. A Two’s knee jerk response to life is to help. It is their default.

That’s why Twos experience your church as a “Partner”.

How Two’s see your church

As Twos. Helpers see a community of Christ followers as potential partners for the task of helping. In other words, they see someone with a need (physical, emotional or spiritual) and the church is their para-helper (think the role of the Holy Spirit) to meet those needs. They are happy to do all they can, run point, ask and network but the church becomes a resource or environment where needs get met and help gets received. A church without a heart to help is no church for them or for their friends. A church that has the heart to help? A Two will invite someone every weekend to that place.

Do’s and Don’ts for connecting a Type Two

Do: Wow their guest.

A guest who is a Two rarely comes alone. They bring with them people who need God in their lives, help or hope of some kind. When they do, they need to know that those guest will be overwhelmed by the helpful heart of your church. Twos need to know that your church doesn’t just see them, but they see any person they would bring through its doors. When that happens, your church is fertile ground to connect not just a two, but they entire relational network of people they want to help.

Don’t: Take advantage of them

Since Twos are Helpers, they could be taken advantage of by unhealthy or clueless ministry leaders or even just needy “church folk”. The most horrible thing you can do to a Two is to not see and value them for who they are by just seeing them as a means to an end. When that happens, a Two will lose respect for you and possibly your entire church and you will not be able to connect them at all. Their difficulty in saying no to anyone can make them easy prey for the selfish or narcissistic. A church culture with too many “takers” can burn a Two out quickly and lose their trust. You then ultimately lose them.

All of this points to their Superpower…

What is the “Superpower” of a Two on a volunteer team?

Their superpower as a volunteer is tirelessness. I have rarely seen the end of a Twos rope when it comes to their willingness to help someone. This means their place in your church’s ministry is on a team that helps people in some way, even if the help is directed at a ministry leader they respect enough to want to set up chairs or stuff bulletins, and the like. It just has to make someone happy in a way they can see and know they are appreciated for. When that happens Twos will…

show up anywhere

stay long afterward

tackle even the most menial or daunting task

fill in any gaps

thank you for the opportunity!

Their tirelessness will add drive, energy and consistency to your ministry if you are able to deliver on the “do” listed above and appreciate them along the way.

Bottom Line: Twos are worth the investment. They always yield a return. So if you need to figure out how to help people in financial need through a simple form and an easily identified contact person, do it. You will become the perfect partner for a Helper.

Nathan and Oliva….engaged!

If you need to grant health and support to your Recovery Ministry so that a Two knows where to take their friends in need of sobriety and freedom, then do it. Twos will meet them at the door and attend with them whether they themselves need recovery or not.

If you need to do a series on marriage or offer small groups on marriage to help people in marital difficulty, do it! Twos will invite every maritally challenged person they know and may even start a small group to better include them in the study.

Nathan grew up and later became my son’s roommate, an extended member of my family, and a Kidside staff member at our LaHabra campus. I also had the privilege of marrying he and his wife Olivia-a Biola graduate, also a staff member at our LaHabra campus, and a member of the focus group that served my research for this Enneagram Series (she is a Six). They are an awesome couple and they certainly take their place in the Pantheon of couples who keep the influence of Jesus spreading in their generation, in our community.

Why? Arguably because Nathan is a Two and he came from a mailer to visit our church one Sunday. So partner with the Nathans visiting your church right now. Help and wow the people they love with the Spirit of Jesus in you. You’ll be glad you did.

Is their a Two on your team? If not, bring one in and have them share what they love about your church and what their greatest concern about it is right now. It will be a clinic for learning the emotional landscape of any Twos visiting your church right now.

Name the place in your church a Two could take a friend who is:

Struggling with addiction

Needing financial help or temporary housing

Experiencing a marital crisis

Losing a loved one to a health issue

Needs a new circle of friends.

What are three ways that you can show appreciation to volunteers with a Two bent? What is a “tripwire” that would tell you if you crossed into the place where you would be taking advantage of someone with the Helper profile on the Enneagram?

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Source: How a Type 2 on the Enneagram experiences your church and how to connect them

The post How a Type 2 on the Enneagram experiences your church and how to connect them appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Greg Curtis: I will never forget the Sunday night service this year where we offered Step 04 of Next Steps at the same time the Oscars was being aired…

Next Steps is our One Place where we invite guests to connect with each other and our church. Being in Southern California, the Academy Awards is a pretty big competition for things like this (think Oscar parties, pools for your pick in each category, etc.).

The reason I won’t soon forget that night of Next Steps was that we only had 1 person show up…..yes, only one! But it gets crazier: he was a film major at a local university. Astounded by his singular presence on such a big night for people in his chosen field, I asked him why he wasn’t watching the Oscars at some party somewhere. His answer was an education for me on how guests are so unique and that one size truly does not fit all. He said, “I am an introvert and I prefer 1 on 1 experiences like this anyway. Besides, I graduate from Next Steps tonight and I wanted to complete it this month and receive my Certificate of Completion.”

I swallowed my shock and sat down at the table instead of standing behind the podium, used my remote to forward slides in the presentation and went to get coffee during the discussion time so he could bond with the table host at the 8 seat table he was seated at.

But here’s the cool part: It went great, and I learned something: guests that God will lead to your church and mine this weekend are not all the same and one style of connecting does not fit all of them. There is simply not a formula that takes their uniqueness into account.

But there is a tool.

The guests that God will lead to your church and mine this weekend are not the same and one style of connecting does not fit them all.

How can you create pathways for connecting guests who are very different from one another?

The answer is found in an ancient tool that organizations from Motorola to the Vatican have used. The Enneagram was used in communities and groups of people called to important tasks long before the DISC test, Strengthfinders and Gary Smalley’s Lion, Otter, Beaver, Retriever personality inventory.

Here’s a little background on the Enneagram.

No one knows exactly where it came from or who originally came up with it. It appears to be used in Monasteries as early as the fourth century to help monks live in community by better understanding their unique perspectives. It’s origins and influences probably predate Christianity though. Finding a resurgence in Bolivia during the 1960s, this tool assigns people a number from 1 thru 9 to describe their basic approach to life, while pointing them toward growth steps that integrate them holistically in a way that looks like Jesus, who bore the strengths of each number without exhibiting their weaknesses.

I used free food to form a young adult Enneagram Focus Group that I used for research into my new understandings of how someone’s number affects their guest experience. They are standing in this photo in Enneagram order: 1. Dave the Reformer, 2. Nathan the Helper, 3. Ivan the Achiever, 4. David the Individualist (thus, the hair), 5. Carly the Investigator, 6. Olivia the Loyalist, 7. Jake the Enthusiast, 8. Evan the Challenger (which seems to be affecting his attitude toward Jake in this photo), and 9. Kendra the Peacemaker. Most of their direct input will appear in my Instagram posts during this series.

The 9 profiles or “types” of people on the Enneagram can be summarized by number like this:

The Reformer

The Helper

The Achiever

The Individualist

The Investigator

The Loyalist

The Enthusiast

The Challenger

The Peacemaker

Furthermore, each number can split into 3 possible sub-profiles:

A pure singular number

A number plus a little bit of the characteristics from the number above them*

A number plus a little bit of the characteristics from the number below them*

*When you have some characteristics from an adjacent number, that number is referred to as yout “wing”. For instance, I am a 3 wing 2 (Achiever/Helper) which makes me a coach-type personality that wants to help others achieve something they believe is worthwhile and important.

So how can understanding the different ways guests approach life make us more effective at helping them make meaningful connections in our faith communities?

That is what we are going to explore in the next 9 posts where I will…

Summarize the distinct characteristics and motivations associated with each number

Define the “Dos and Don’ts” of relating to people of each type as guests in your church

Share their unique “Superpower” if they were to join one of your teams as a volunteer.

Since connecting at church for your guests is more of a climb than a coast, we all have to become Sherpas that identify the best route for each of them to reach the summit of full connection. Understanding people’s Enneagram number will make you more effective at helping people find their small group of friends at your church and their unique role in serving others on a ministry team.

Understanding people’s Enneagram number will make you more effective at helping people find their small group of friends at your church and their unique role in serving others on a ministry team.

Here are 3 resources to make this journey of understanding the Enneagram a very profitable one for your assimilation ministry (and 2 of them are free!):

The Road Back to You.

This is by far my favorite book on the topic. I have always enjoyed Ian Morgan Cron’s perspectives on life and ministry and his humor and powerful insights on the Enneagram do not disappoint here. The structure of the book is the WIN for me, which includes…

A chapter on each type

20 questions before each chapter to discover if you or someone else is that number type (I personally find these more accurate and helpful than the paid ones online)

Which number you or someone else of the same type (like your guests) become when they are stressed, secure, as a child, in the work place and in relationships.

A 10 point growth plan to become more like Jesus for each number.

Typology Podcast

This is Ian Morgan Cron’s new podcast where he interviews leaders who represent the various numbers on the Enneagram and what environments they thrive or falter in (imagine what that knowledge could bring you and your ministry in relationship to guests at church!). Subscribe to this free resource. You will enjoy it and find it very interesting.

My Instagram.

I know this sounds self aggrandizing but I can’t help how excited I am about the assets I have had designed that will appear on my Instagram during this series. I will be posting guest experience scenarios (parking lot, greeters, altar calls, volunteer sign ups, membership classes, etc.) and how each one receives them from the perspective of their number on the Enneagram. This kind of awareness will be priceless as well as fun and will largely only appear on my Instagram account where I post my assimilation learnings in real time during the average week of my life as a Sherpa.

So what about my lone guest at Step 04 of Next Steps during the Oscars?

When I realized he was a 1 wing 9, an introverted rule keeper who finishes what he commits himself to, I was able to calibrate the experience in a way that made him feel valued and a part of the church. He declared himself a member of our church that night. He even won a fleece blanket by winning the Unleash Compassion game. How you may ask? Instead of having him go up and sit on the stage we had set up, I had him stay in his seat at the table and challenged him to get 4 out of 6 questions right to win. And…he did! (I would have given him the fleece blanket anyway but don’t tell him).

After giving him his Certificate of Completion I realized that he came to us feeling like a guest and left us that night a unique member of our spiritual family. That’s why I love our Next Steps environment and what it does almost automatically for those who experience it, customizing and easily scaling the experience along the way.

In the coming posts in this series, I want to encourage all of us to see and respond well to the unique needs of each guest so we will become Sherpas with mad skills in helping them reach their summit successfully (spoken like a 3 wing 2, I know…).

What is the one personality inventory or strengths assessment that told you the most about you? How did it help you understand others? What is one relationship in your life that it helped you understand better?

Have you ever had a guest that didn’t seem to gel with the way your church normally connects people? How did you handle that?

On a 1 to 10 scale, how much freedom do you have to customize a connection experience for the guests at your church? How can your team strategically take advantage of that degree of freedom to benefit your guests?

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Source: How the Enneagram can help you reach a bigger variety of guests at your church

The post How the Enneagram can help you reach a bigger variety of guests at your church appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Rich Birch: What is the process by which guests transition from unfamiliarity with your church to becoming raving fans? How do they move through those phases, and how are we helping them at every step along the way?

Understanding how guests transition along the spectrum from stranger to advocate for the church is important for us as we build our programs and processes.

I’m a firm believer that churches need to think in steps, not programs. We need to think about how we’re moving people from where they are to where we want them to be, and if everything we do doesn’t help them make one step closer on that path, we need to reevaluate what’s working and what’s not.

In this post, I’ve attempted to outline what I think are the eight phases that every guest who comes to our church needs to move through, in order to transition from complete anonymity to deep community.

Awareness of your church

Frankly, I think most of our churches stumble on this very first phase. The reality is that most people in our neighborhoods don’t know we exist. Don’t believe me? Go to the gas station down the road, pretend you’re from out of town, and ask them a simple question. Say, “Hey, what do you know about that church down the road? We’re thinking about going there this weekend. What do you know about them?” I think you might be shocked at what people say. (I know I was at first—I’ve been performing this exercise over the years I’ve spent visiting churches.) There have been instances where I have been directly across the street from a church and when I asked that question, the people at the gas station either didn’t know the church existed or knew it was there but had no idea what actually went on inside.

Potential guests need to know that your church exists. This should be pretty obvious, but my personal research has proven otherwise! How are you building awareness of your church in your community? What are you doing to get your people out of their seats and into the streets so that folks in your town know that your church exists? If people are unaware of your church, they can’t ever take a step inside the door…

Source: 8 Phases of Moving Guests from Anonymity to Community at Your Church – unSeminary

The post 8 Phases of Moving Guests from Anonymity to Community at Your Church appeared first on Passion for Planting.