By Doug Holliday:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Matthew 11:28-29 NIV

How are you doing with rest these days?

There’s this interesting encounter Jesus had with a Canaanite woman who pleaded with Him to heal her daughter. It’s interesting because at first Jesus ignored her. Then, when her persistent pleading grew annoying, the disciples wanted Jesus to send her away. Instead of immediately sending her away, Jesus told her that He had come for the lost sheep of Israel.

All this seems very un-Christ-like. Where’s His compassion? This would be a simple healing. It’s not like Jesus to ignore people who asked Him for help.

“Jesus did not answer a word. So his disciples came to him and urged him, ‘Send her away, for she keeps crying out after us.’”

Matthew? ?15:23? ?NIV??

Eventually, her pleading convinced Jesus to act. But why the delay? Why the debate?

One thought we should consider is that Jesus had taken the disciples to Tyre and Sidon not to do ministry, but to rest. After John the Baptist’s death, when the disciples returned from being sent out two by two for a period of intense ministry throughout Galilee, He told them He wanted to get away with them to rest (and likely grieve). This planned rest was interrupted by the large crowd who followed and found Him when Jesus and the disciples got off the boat in Bethsaida. After a full day of ministry meeting the overwhelming, pressing needs of the crowd, Jesus fed the 5,000.

Was the journey to the coastal cities of Tyre and Sidon intended to be a seaside retreat to escape the crowds and find desperately needed rest? Is this why Jesus didn’t want to heal the Canaanite woman’s daughter? News would spread, and crowds seeking healing would come to find the miracle working Messiah, making rest impossible. Was Jesus’ not responding to the Canaanite woman initially the equivalent of Him turning off His cell phone?

This interaction could be viewed as callous and uncaring when He initially ignored her, but could the reality be that in fact Jesus was demonstrating the priority of rest, especially in light of the fact that He’d soon tell the disciples He’d be going to Jerusalem to die?

Jesus knew it was about to get intense. And it did!

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The crowds continued to grow. The demands continued to increase. Where a few months earlier Jesus drew a crowd of 5,000 men plus women and children in Jewish town of Bethsaida, after being in Tyre and Sidon He drew a crowd of 4,000 men plus women and children in Gentile region of the Decapolis.

“Great crowds came to him, bringing the lame, the blind, the crippled, the mute and many others, and laid them at his feet; and he healed them.”

Matthew? ?15:30? ?NIV??

We find Jesus again and again, in the midst of ministry intensity, getting away from the crowd. Perhaps this was to prioritize rest.

“After Jesus had sent the crowd away, he got into the boat and went to the vicinity of Magadan.”

Matthew? ?15:39? ?NIV??

Magadan (possibly another name for Magdala) was a smaller town south of Jesus’ base of operations in bustling Capernaum.

“Jesus then left them and went away.”

Matthew? ?16:4?b NIV??

“When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, ‘Who do people say the Son of Man is?’”

Matthew? ?16:13? ?NIV??

Caesarea Philippi, north of Galilee, was a center for Pagan Worship, somewhere Jews would not go. The crowds from Galilee would not follow Jesus there, so was this another way to escape the crowds and retreat with His disciples?

“After six days Jesus took with him Peter, James and John the brother of James, and led them up a high mountain by themselves.”

Matthew 17:1 NIV

The hike up the mountain with Peter, James and John where Jesus was transfigured was another way to escape the crowds to find a place to pray, reflect, rest, and be with the Father.

It was absolutely critical that Jesus and the disciples prioritized rest at this point because of the intensity of what was coming. The emotional toll would be great.

“From that time on Jesus began to explain to his disciples that he must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things at the hands of the elders, the chief priests and the teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and on the third day be raised to life.” ??

Matthew? ?16:21? ?NIV??

Jesus continually modeled the priority of rest.

“But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.”

Luke 5:16 NIV

“Therefore Jesus no longer moved about publicly among the people of Judea. Instead he withdrew to a region near the wilderness, to a village called Ephraim, where he stayed with his disciples.”

John 11:54 NIV

“Each day Jesus was teaching at the temple, and each evening he went out to spend the night on the hill called the Mount of Olives.”

Luke 21:37 NIV

Jesus prioritized rest. He got away from the crowds. He practiced solitude.

Jesus prioritized rest. He got away from the craziness. He practiced stillness.

Jesus prioritized rest. He got away from the challenges. He practiced soul-care.

How intense is ministry for you right now? What kind of emotional toll are the demands of ministry taking on your soul and in your relationships? Jesus prioritized rest. Are you? Burning the candle at both ends leaves nothing in the middle. You know what’s in the middle?

Your heart.

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

Proverbs 4:23 NIV

By Doug Holliday

Used by permission. Originally posted here:

The post How to Prioritize Rest Like Jesus appeared first on Discipleship.org.

Source: How to Prioritize Rest Like Jesus

The post How to Prioritize Rest Like Jesus appeared first on Passion for Planting.

Source: Thriving in Leadership

The post Thriving in Leadership appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by TheChurch.Digital: Dearest church leader, online pastor, or tech worker-

With all sincerity, I tell you this:

Take a break.

It’s the only way you’re going to successfully rediscover your RHYTHM.

Don’t get snippy with me, either.  I know it’s tough right now. But your rhythm is of VITAL IMPORTANCE.

—–

Before I was a Digital Pastor, I was a Worship Pastor. My entire life has actually been around music.  Every member of my family is a brilliant musician, involved in church worship.

One thing that our entire family was blessed with knowing where “one” is. “One” in the case of music is the starting of a new measure or section.  We can screw up our lyrics, our strumming patterns, our drum fills, but we always could just feel how to get back into the groove.  We could feel the rhythm.  Cool Runnings-esque.

Music students are taught to not just flail around and play nonsense when they lose their rhythm, but instead to pause, rest a beat or two, and then come back in on “one.”

In music as in life, we have a tendency to live our daily lives in routines, in patterns.  In RHYTHMS. Literally everyone has them.

The Bible is also filled with them.  The entire sin-to-humility pattern in the Old Testament for Moses, all of the judges, David, Solomon, all of the kings.  Even God the Creator took the seventh day to rest in His creation and enacted it to be so.

Do you honestly think God NEEDED to rest?  Because I sure don’t.

But, like a good Father, He is setting down a stake for how to live a life of rhythm, of ebbing and flowing, of creation and rest.  The ideal way to live, God says, is to work and rest.

He knows we’re sinful.  So we’ll sin, and then repent. And grace abounds.

Rhythmic.  Sin, repentance, grace.  Work, rest.

—–

In the last month, most of us have had our lives turned…well, what’s worse than upside-down?  Inside-out?

My family has been tossed around.  No more typical Sunday routines. No more work for my wife.  No more school or youth group for my kids. No more track meets or baseball games or guitar lessons or hanging out at the park.

My own rhythms of daily quiet times filled with prayer, journaling, and Scripture reading have been upended.

If you’re like me, you can’t feel the rhythm right now.  You’re breathlessly attacking a day that has nothing other than a list of mountains to climb, and your energies are becoming less and less.

Our low-level anxiety we all have right now comes from the loss of rhythm.  And it’s manifesting itself in our grocery store purchasing behavior and our fascination with Tiger King.

And, for the Type-A Ennagram 1’s out there like me (many of you church leaders), the loss of rhythm is coming out in our work habits.  

I read Psalm 127:2 and get chills:

“It is in vain that you rise up earlyand go late to rest,eating the bread of anxious toil;for he gives to his beloved sleep.”

“Vain? Not me!  I’m working this hard so that blah blah blah.”

Yes, I get it.  I’m vain too. And when I get out of the rhythms of prayer and rest I feel as if the world is stretching me thin, much like a Stretch Armstrong doll being pulled apart.

Raise your hand if this is one of the busiest seasons of life you’ve ever experienced, if you could count the hours you’ve spent AWAY from your computer in fractions, or if you’ve had meetings/calls that seem to push you further away from your mission.

Raise your hand if you’re just downright scared.

—–

It’s okay.  This is a safe place.

I’m with you.  I can’t feel the rhythm right now.  And that scares me.

So what do we do about that?

We need a reset.  We need to find where “one” is again.  We need to feel the music again.

Because, Biblically, what happens when the people of God reset?

Blessing comes.  God acts. Grace appears.  A new song starts.

—–

YOU need to reset.  To take a break. To not flail around, but to pause, wait a beat or two, and then enter the song again on “one.”

If not for your own sake, then for the sanity of your family or your church.

Please, take today or tomorrow or one day in the next week.  Sleep in a little. Eat. Go for a walk or a run outside. Enjoy a cup of coffee.  Play with your kids. Read a stinking book.

DON’T open your laptop.  DON’T check your e-mail. DON’T think about metrics or views or totals.

Rest.  Recover.  Take a break.  Your church is going to be there when you get back.  Your scheduling of premieres, cutting of videos, answering emails, Zoom meetings, and Instagram DMs…they will all be there.

You’re going to find that your life will slowly return to “One.”  Is it going to be playing the same song as before?

Absolutely not.

But I bet you’ll be surprised at how much you like the new song.  And I bet it sounds amazing.

Source: Hey Church Leader, How’s Your Margin?

The post Hey Church Leader, How's Your Margin? appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Shawn Lovejoy: We are not wired to function without rest.

Take a moment and personalize that.

YOU are not wired to function without rest.

This is true on a base human level, but it is a good lesson for leaders as well. “Burning the midnight oil” is a great metaphor, but does not make a leader effective over the long haul.

Leaders need rest.

You need rest.

Here are 4 reasons why.

You need rest because…

Tired eyes rarely see a bright future.

Leaders are dealers of hope. Inspiring others to better days is our core task. Exhaustion causes us to see the future dimly. It is impossible to inspire when we feel stuck in the mire. Rest removes us from the pressure of the urgent to see the possibilities of the future. Those you lead are struggling to see past the immediacy of their own moment. They need you engaged in the potential of what lies ahead.

When fatigue walks in faith walks out.

Leadership is hard. At the core of a great cause is the belief that what you are doing will work. A lack of rest robs us of the strength to hold on to that belief. It is ok to get tired, but it is not ok to stay tired. You have to lead yourself enough to recognize when you need to hit pause. One indicator is when you begin to see things through the dark veil of fear. Rest renews faith.

Exhaustion makes mountains seem taller and valleys seem lower.

When a leader is tired what once looked like a challenge morphs into an impossibility. Leaders tackle big mountains and persevere through dark valleys. Perspective helps keep leaders balanced during turbulent times. Rest is the key that unlocks perspective.

Decisions when you’re worn out result in potential fall out.

I heard someone say, “Don’t make a big decision when you’re tired.” Instead of pressing through and forcing decisions it is often best to wait. If I face a major decision while I feel pressured or tired, I make the decision to wait!  When you are exhausted being decisive can become divisive. Wait, rest, then decide.

Your next leadership breakthrough may come on the other side of a nap!

talk to a coach

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Source: 4 Reasons Leaders Need Rest

The post 4 Reasons Leaders Need Rest appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Carey Nieuwhof: You’re probably feeling a little tired.

And if that’s the case, you’re not alone. Exhaustion, anxiety and stress seems to be a growing problem in leadership.

Recently, a planned sabbatical made headlines when mega-church pastor Howard-John Wesley stood before 4500 worshippers in early December and told them he was tired and taking a Sabbatical.

“I am tired in my soul,” Wesley said, among many other things he shared.

There was no scandal, no moral failure…just fatigue—a soul-weariness that most of us who have led for more than a few minutes know all too well. (The full message is a great listen for any leader struggling with fatigue…and the message is better than the articles that summarize it. Howard-John is nuanced, thoughtful and very real. Listen here.)

What encouraged me so much about Wesley was his decision to take a break before something bad happened—or at least something worse than the fatigue and frustration he confessed to. As he said in the message, he’s not burned out. He’s coming back. But he’s tired.

When you peel behind the headlines of mega-church pastor failures, business leaders who get fired, the resignations of politicians and even implosion of athletes, one common theme is that many of them were tired…dead tired. (I offer some thoughts on why mega-church pastors keep failing in this post.)

Run on empty for long, and it’s almost inevitable that you end up doing something you (and many others) will regret for a long time.

So—now the big question— why is leadership so exhausting?

Here are 5 reasons I’ve seen in my own leadership and life.

1. Your Ratio of Output to Input Is Skewed

One of the chief roles of leadership is to produce. Think about it.

As a leader, you’re responsible for:

results

content

the team

wins

changed lives

progress

widgets

financials

And that’s just a partial list.

All of which means your job as a leader is to create outputs.

But like a bank account, outputs have to be at least matched, if not exceeded, by inputs. Otherwise, you go bankrupt.

If you were to look at your life right now, what’s your ratio of output to input? My guests for most leaders it’s running 5:1. Or maybe 10:1.

That’s a problem.

Inputs for leaders include rest, learning, growth, life-giving relationships, spiritual development, healthy eating, exercise, training, outside ideas, hobbies and…(remember this?)…fun.

If your output consistently exceeds your input as a leader, you’re on the road to bankruptcy.

If your output consistently exceeds your input as a leader, you’re on the road to bankruptcy. Click To Tweet

2. You’re Never Really Off

Technology has changed so much in the last decade.

Because of the pressures of leadership, leaders have always had a hard time being ‘off’. There’s always more to be done.

But smartphones and the proliferation of inboxes on every single social platform, and ‘advances’ like Slack, email, text messaging and plain old voicemail means a leader is never really off.

You used to go to work, now, thanks to technology, work goes to you…and never leaves you.

It might be easy to think you’re just taking 5 minutes out of your family’s Disney+ movie night, but every interaction takes its toll.

I have friends in medicine who are on call all the time. They tell me they never sleep the same knowing they could be called. Even if they happen to make it through the night without a call, they still don’t wake up as rested.

These days, that’s pretty much all of us.

You used to go to work, now, thanks to technology, work goes to you…and never leaves you.Click To Tweet

3. And You’re Never Really On

In the same way work follows you everywhere you go via your pocket or purse, your life now follows you to work.

Not only are you tired from not enough sleep, and stressed from working a bit the night before, but now your whole life is accessible at work. You can book dinner reservations, text your family, check your personal social media accounts and so much more.

As a result, it’s harder to focus at work and stay productive.

You’re never really on, and you’re never really off. You just live in a perpetual grey zone.

Because of technology, you’re never really on, and you’re never really off. You just live in a perpetual grey zone. Click To Tweet

4. There’s No Finish Line

Even if you’re never really on and never really off, there’s an even bigger question: when are you done leading?

Correct. Never.

The blessing and curse of leadership is that there’s always more: more people to serve, people to reach or clients to acquire.

And then there’s better.

One of the things that drives most leaders is the desire to improve. Which is awesome, and often very needed.

But eventually, excellent brings diminishing returns. If your work amounts to, say, an 8.5 out of 10, for example, making it a 9.5 might take you hours, or days, or even thousands (or hundreds of thousands of dollars). And for what?

When something that might requires double the effort or dollars only produces 10% more, you have to question the return on investment. Especially when, in all likelihood, 10% more effort in another area might produce 30% greater results.

Unaware of the diminishing returns, most leaders keep pushing for no real reason.

And here’s the sobering reality: if you don’t declare a finish line, your body will.

If you don’t declare a finish line, your body will. Click To Tweet

5. Rest looks like weakness 

For a lot of us in leadership, rest either looks like weakness or unfaithfulness.

It’s actually just the opposite.

Elite athletes know that recovery is key to performance. Without sleep, nutrition and rest, your body just can’t perform at top levels.

Neither can you.

I still find it hard to be still, because rest looks like unproductive time to me. And deep down, I fear underneath that is laziness.

Most driven, tired leaders I know are anything but lazy. Laziness is resting when you’re not tired. Resting when you’re tired and building in recovery days and even seasons can be the difference between you leading for years or leading well for decades.

Rest isn’t weakness. A rested you is a better you and a sharper you.

Rest isn’t weakness. A rested you is a better you and a sharper you. Click To Tweet

Two Ways To Beat the Fatigue

Beyond the obvious “get some rest”, what can you do to defeat your fatigue? I’m literally writing a book on this right now, but here are two ideas that can help right now.

First, monitor your ratio of output to input. If you’re consistently putting out more than you’re taking in (as covered in Point 1), then adjust the ratio.

Reduce output voluntarily before exhaustion and burnout reduces your output involuntarily.

Second, be radically proactive about self-care. 

A decade ago, John Piper (a pastor of a large church with a global ministry) took a pro-active leave , and was exceptionally candid about some of the problems that were surfacing him that he wanted to address and work on.

In Piper’s case, there was no presenting ‘crisis’, but he felt one brewing.

In Piper’s own words:

I asked the elders to consider this leave because of a growing sense that my soul, my marriage, my family, and my ministry-pattern need a reality check from the Holy Spirit. On the one hand, I love my Lord, my wife, my five children and their families first and foremost; and I love my work of preaching and writing and leading Bethlehem. I hope the Lord gives me at least five more years as the pastor for preaching and vision at Bethlehem.

But on the other hand, I see several species of pride in my soul that, while they may not rise to the level of disqualifying me for ministry, grieve me, and have taken a toll on my relationship with Noël and others who are dear to me. How do I apologize to you, not for a specific deed, but for ongoing character flaws, and their effects on everybody? I’ll say it now, and no doubt will say it again, I’m sorry. Since I don’t have just one deed to point to, I simply ask for a spirit of forgiveness; and I give you as much assurance as I can that I am not making peace, but war, with my own sins.

Wise. Wise, wise, wise. Very wise.

If you start getting healthy before there’s a crisis, you’ll have fewer crises.

If you start getting healthy before there’s a crisis, you’ll have fewer crises. Click To Tweet

READY TO GET HEALTHIER?

Exhausted thinking about how much work is ahead of you?

Good news. A small investment will pay huge dividends in getting you healthier and freeing up time to make your organization healthier.

I’d love to help you do that.

I’ve helped over 3000 leaders free up hundreds of hours each year and often 3 hours a day to do what they feel they never have time for and get healthier in the process.

My High Impact Leader course, is my online, on-demand course designed to help you get time, energy and priorities working in your favour.

It’s perfect for leaders who feel like they never have enough time in the day to get the really important things done.

Many leaders who have taken it are recovering 3 productive hours a day.  That’s about 1000 hours of found time each year. That’s a lot of time for what matters most.

Here are what some alumni are saying about The High Impact Leader Course”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you for providing the course again. It has absolutely made an impact in my life and family already that I can’t even describe.” – Joel Rowland, Clayton County, North Carolina

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“A game-changer.” Pam Perkins,  Colorado Springs, Colorado

Curious? Want to beat overwhelm and have the time to reflect, rest and reinvent yourself?

Click here to learn more or get instant access.

What Are You Sensing?

So, what do you think contributes to the exhaustion so many leaders feel?

And how are you learning to prevent it?

Scroll down and leave a comment!

The post Why Leadership Is So Exhausting—And What to Do About It appeared first on CareyNieuwhof.com.

Source: Why Leadership Is So Exhausting—And What to Do About It

The post Why Leadership Is So Exhausting—And What to Do About It appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Carey Nieuwhof: Few people have impacted Carey’s personal journey as much as Terry Wardle. That’s why it’s such a thrill to bring podcast listeners this interview.

Terry talks about why so many leaders cave under the pressure of leadership, what’s underneath the moral failure so many leaders experienced, and how to grieve the losses that come your way in leadership and ministry.

Welcome to Episode 309 of the podcast. Listen and access the show notes below or search for the Carey Nieuwhof Leadership Podcast on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts and listen for free.

Guest Links

Facebook | Website | Healing Care | Some Kind of Crazy

Episode Links

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Conversation Links

A Failure of Nerve by Edwin H. Friedman

Some Kind of Crazy by Terry Wardle

Hillbilly Elegy by J. D. Vance

Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott

The End of Memory by Miroslav Volf

Jesus and the Disinherited by Howard Thurman

Slingstones Podcast by Terry Wardle

Healing Care Mandate International

The High Impact Leader

3 Insights from Terry

1. Dysfunctional behavior is usually the symptom of a deeper problem

Terry is convinced that aberrant behavior is driven by deep wounds and false beliefs and ungrieved loss. When he looks back on his life, his depression, workaholism, and agoraphobia was never the problem, it was the symptom of a deeper problem of ungrieved losses from his past.

Eventually, Terry was able to work through the deeper issues of his past, and has since begun leading others through a similar healing journey. He works with people who have addictions, anger issues, deep depression, and many other struggles so that they can begin to attack the real wounds that are impacting them.

2. Ministry is a series of ungrieved losses

“Every loss in life demands an appropriate season of grieving, whether you’ve lost your favorite person or your favorite end.” Now, when Terry walks into a room of pastors, he can feel the ungrieved loss in that room. This breaks his heart and causes him to want to help more people.

When Terry first taught this in a seminar, someone grabbed him and said, “Say that quote again. Just say it again.” And he did. When he repeated the statement, the person started to cry because they realized when you experience a loss and just move on, rationalize it, or get onto the business of work, you cheat the grieving process.

3. It takes an emotional laden positive experience to overcome an emotional laden negative experience

Through his time of personal healing and counseling other leaders, Terry has learned that knowing scripture isn’t enough to get over the deep wounds and fears of our past. Terry has learned that it takes an emotional laden positive experience to overcome an emotional laden negative experience.

Just knowing the scripture, “Perfect love casts out fear,” does not cast out fear. It takes a very real experience with perfect love himself to cast out fear. This is what Terry encourages people to seek.

Quotes from Episode 309

Many people and leaders are not stable in their identity, and as a result, they use performance and achievement as a way of advancing themselves. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

Workaholism in ministry is not a matter of theology, it’s a matter of pathology. And until we deal with that pathology, we’re not going to be the men and women that we are supposed to be. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

There’s nothing that beats a person down more than trying to measure up. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

While my gifting and anointing were such that there was advancement in my ministry, I was actually just crushed inside by not dealing with the brokenness of my past. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

When you are basing your ministry on performance, your last performance isn’t good enough. It has to be the next performance. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

People want to kill the pain of loss. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

I am convinced that aberrant behavior is driven by deep wounds and false beliefs and ungrieved loss. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

Loss is meant to be grieved. And when we fail to grieve losses, that loss internalizes. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

If you have the fruit of dysfunction, you have the root of wounding. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

Grieving loss begins with finding a safe environment with people that are non condemning, empathic, who are confidential and who finally give you the permission to say what’s inside and say it like it is. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

Every wound in life, every loss in life, every false belief, needs confronted in the presence of Christ so we can be freed from those. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

When Jesus was at his worst, God didn’t give him a scripture. He gave him an experience of his presence. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

Change doesn’t happen because someone told you you need to change, change happens when you’re desperate enough to say, I must change. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

I think many of us try to forgive before we grieve. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

You got to grieve the losses that have come your way. And then if there’s someone to forgive after you’ve grieved it, you’ll have the strength to go ahead and forgive. – Terry WardleClick To Tweet

You’ll know when forgiveness is complete when the issue no longer comes to mind. – Miroslav VolfClick To Tweet

Read or Download the Transcript for Episode 309

Looking for a key quote? More of a reader?

Read or download a free PDF transcript of this episode here.

Watch Back Episodes of The Podcast on YouTube

Select episodes of this podcast are now on YouTube. Our new YouTube Channel gives you a chance to watch some episodes, not just listen. We’ll add select episodes to YouTube as time goes on.

Didn’t See It Coming Will Help You Solve the Problems Most Leaders Miss

If you want practical help overcoming some of the biggest challenges leaders face, my book Didn’t See It Coming: Overcoming the 7 Greatest Challenges That Nobody Expects and Everyone Experiences tackles the seven core issues that take people out: cynicism, compromise, disconnectedness, irrelevance, pride, burnout, and the emptiness of success and provides strategies on how to combat each.

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Over the years, one of the things I’ve enjoyed most about being a public speaker is having opportunities to hang out with Carey…It’s not a matter of if you’ll run into these challenges; it’s a matter of when. Be prepared by spending a little time with a leader who has already been there.” Jon Acuff, NYT best-selling author

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Hopefully, this episode has helped you lead like never before. That’s my goal. If you appreciated it, could you share the love?

The best way to do that is to rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts and leave us a brief review! You can do the same on Stitcher and on TuneIn as well.

Your ratings and reviews help us place the podcast in front of new leaders and listeners. Your feedback also lets me know how I can better serve you.

Thank you for being so awesome.

Next Episode: Jasmine Star

Jasmine Star dropped out of law school, didn’t even own a camera, and within 4 years was one of top photographers in the world. These days as a strategist, entrepreneur and social media influencer, Jasmine talks about how to find and connect with your dream customer or audience, how focusing on who you want to reach drives growth, and how to protect your online message against the algorithm changes that happen all the time.

Subscribe for free now and you won’t miss Episode 310.

The post CNLP 309: Terry Wardle on Why So Many Leaders Cave Under the Pressures of Leadership, Why Leaders Implode Morally, and How to Grieve Your Leadership Losses appeared first on CareyNieuwhof.com.

Source: CNLP 309: Terry Wardle on Why So Many Leaders Cave Under the Pressures of Leadership, Why Leaders Implode Morally, and How to Grieve Your Leadership Losses

The post CNLP 309: Terry Wardle on Why So Many Leaders Cave Under the Pressures of Leadership, Why Leaders Implode Morally, and How to Grieve Your Leadership Losses appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Carey Nieuwhof: John Ortberg has a brand new podcast, What Were You Thinking? Today, we flip the mic, and John interviews Carey Nieuwhof about workaholism, how to be appropriately vulnerable about your story, and finding God when things get tough in life and leadership.

Welcome to Episode 307 of the podcast. Listen and access the show notes below or search for the Carey Nieuwhof Leadership Podcast on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts and listen for free.

Guest Links

Twitter | Facebook | Instagram | What Were You Thinking?

Episode Links

What if, in 40 days, you could grow your small groups in your church by 40%? Based on Pastor Zach Zehnder’s book, The Red Letter Challenge is a 40-day turnkey church campaign that centers around making more effective disciples of Jesus. Go to RedLetterChallenge.com/Carey to find church packages ready to go for you.

The High Impact Workplace

10 Million Podcast Downloads Giveaway

Managing Leadership Anxiety by Steve Cuss

Didn’t See It Coming by Carey Nieuwhof

The Genesee Diary by Henry Nouwen

3 Insights from John and Carey

1. Burnout is a factor for all driven people

Most leaders eventually hit a wall, whether it’s clinical burnout, their marriage falling apart, their relationship with their kids deteriorating, or realizing they simply need to delegate. Every driven leader gets there. When they hit this wall, they realize that a change needs to be made, but most have no clue what that change is.

Although it’s not the same for everyone, it is almost always tied to a lie that a leader believes. Carey has learned that he, as a leader, was believing that his performance defined his worth. This led to him trying to perform more and more until he hit his wall. Ever since, he has been intentional about living in a way today that will help him thrive tomorrow.

2. The senior leader sets the culture

Over many years of thinking and inspecting his own leadership, Carey has learned that unhealthy leaders create unhealthy cultures. He knows this because he used to be that unhealthy leader. Now, he has spent years changing how he views the purpose of work in his and his team’s lives.

He used to think that he uses people to get work done, and that led to an unhealthy culture. Now, he has realized that he is trying to use work to grow the people that work there. In a healthy culture, people are the goal, not the work.

3. The appropriate level of vulnerability to have from the stage is…

Carey has learned that the voice and position we communicate from makes a massive impact on whether the message is helpful or not. Many leaders naturally take a position where they are up on top of a mountain, and if you want access to them, you have to come sit at their feet. Carey has learned that this position doesn’t work. People admire your strengths but they resonate with your weaknesses.

So what voice does Carey use? He uses a voice that is “ in the field” with the reader. This voice is saying, “I know this is hard, I struggle too, but maybe making this change will help us.” When Carey uses this voice, he is much more engaged with his audience.

Quotes from Episode 307

Spiritual health is often a casualty of ministry and leadership. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

When you’re winning at church and losing at home, you’re losing. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

How do I live in a way today that will help me thrive tomorrow? @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

The office is something we used to go to, and now the office goes to us. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

By the time this race is over, I want the people closest to me to be the people who are most grateful for me. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

People are most tempted to quit moments before their critical breakthrough. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

The health of the organization is directly linked to the health of the senior leader. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

Unhealthy leaders create unhealthy cultures. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

Sometimes burnout is God’s will for your life because he wants to do a redirection. @johnortbergClick To Tweet

If God wants to go deep. It’s because he wants to take you far. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

You cannot over communicate. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

Read or Download the Transcript for Episode 307

Looking for a key quote? More of a reader?

Read or download a free PDF transcript of this episode here.

Watch Back Episodes of The Podcast on YouTube

Select episodes of this podcast are now on YouTube. Our new YouTube Channel gives you a chance to watch some episodes, not just listen. We’ll add select episodes to YouTube as time goes on.

INTRODUCING THE HIGH IMPACT WORKPLACE
(AND MY FREE COACHING GUIDE)

There’s a talent war going on for the best leaders, a generational divide at work, and, according to Gallup, 70% of all workers are disengaged at work (meaning that they show up and only do the bare minimum.)

Introducing The High Impact Workplace, a new online, on-demand course where I show you what’s changing in the workplace and how to respond. As a founder and senior leader myself, I’ll share a strategy that will help you engage even the best and most gifted young leaders at work.

In the course, I’ll give you the exact strategies you need to:

Attract and keep high capacity leaders who would otherwise start their own businesses.
Identify and leverage the currency that motivates young leaders.
Navigate flexible work arrangements that result in deeper productivity.
Master the 5 questions every great manager asks their team for deeper engagement.
Discover how to create workplace environments that multiple generations can thrive in.
Learn how to keep your company or organization relevant to the next generation of leaders.

The High Impact Workplace will give you the edge you need to create the best team you can moving forward in an age where 8-4 doesn’t work anymore (just ask any young leader about that).

Enrollment to the course is only open for a few days and only available now at this low price. So hurry!

To learn more or get access today to the High Impact Workplace, click here.

Subscribed Yet? 

Subscribe for free and never miss out on wisdom from world-class leaders like Brian Houston, Andy Stanley, Craig Groeschel, Nancy Duarte, Henry Cloud, Patrick Lencioni, Francis Chan, Ann Voskamp, Erwin McManus and many others.

Subscribe using your favorite podcast app via

Apple Podcasts

Spotify

Google Play

Stitcher

TuneIn

Spread the Word. Leave a Rating and Review

Hopefully, this episode has helped you lead like never before. That’s my goal. If you appreciated it, could you share the love?

The best way to do that is to rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts and leave us a brief review! You can do the same on Stitcher and on TuneIn as well.

Your ratings and reviews help us place the podcast in front of new leaders and listeners. Your feedback also lets me know how I can better serve you.

Thank you for being so awesome.

Next Episode: Larry Osborne

Larry Osborne shares 4 decades of wisdom with leaders on everything from how to connect high capacity leaders, to what to do if you wanted to make a million dollars, to questions you should ask other leaders, to meeting dynamics on how to handle him. Carey spends almost the entire episode pitching some of his favorite Larry Osborne quotes back to Larry and having Larry expound on them. The results are fascinating.

Subscribe for free now and you won’t miss Episode 308.

The post CNLP 307: John Ortberg and Carey Nieuwhof on Workaholism, How to Be Appropriately Vulnerable, and Finding God When Things are Bad in Leadership appeared first on CareyNieuwhof.com.

Source: CNLP 307: John Ortberg and Carey Nieuwhof on Workaholism, How to Be Appropriately Vulnerable, and Finding God When Things are Bad in Leadership

The post CNLP 307: John Ortberg and Carey Nieuwhof on Workaholism, How to Be Appropriately Vulnerable, and Finding God When Things are Bad in Leadership appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Carey Nieuwhof: New York Times bestselling author, Max Lucado, talks about how he knew he didn’t have another ten years of senior leadership in him, why his passion has shifted, what causes happiness, and how to be happier.

Plus, Max shares some thoughts on the best and worst decisions he’s made over his decades in leadership.

Welcome to Episode 290 of the podcast. Listen and access the show notes below or search for the Carey Nieuwhof Leadership Podcast on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts and listen for free.

Guest Links

Max Lucado |  Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | How Happiness Happens

Episode Links

Need help with your church’s website and digital outreach? Check out Pro WebFire, and get a FREE custom website build for the plan you choose by using the discount code Carey2019. Act now before the offer expires at the end of this month.

Carey will be speaking at the Future Forward Conference this October 1st and 2nd. If you’re a church leader or member who is committed fully to engaging the next generation in a rapidly changing world, join us by signing up here today.

CNLP 221: Max Lucado On How He’s Written Over 120 Books, Why He Never Uses Ghostwriters, How to Stay Fresh in Leadership, And His Favorite Book

Vanderbloemen Resource Center

Ten Signs of a Leadership Crash by Stephen Mansfield

Research on the pursuit of happiness

Unshakable Hope by Max Lucado

3 Insights from Max

1.Your interests and callings might come only for a season

Many leaders hold onto their leadership positions for too long. Max and Carey both have come to the place where they needed to pass on their lead pastor role to the next generation of leaders. How did they know it was time to move on? Max described it as “when he dipped his ladle into his leadership bucket, all he heard was a scraping sound.” He just didn’t have anything left for it.

Max would also want to encourage you that just because you are called to something in one season, doesn’t mean you are called to that thing in all seasons of your life. How much of a tragedy would it be if you received all of your callings and giftings on the day of your conversion? It would make the rest of your life pretty boring. Your calling is for life but your assignment might change.

2. Advantages of staying in the same ministry for 31 years 

Max has been in a place of leadership at his church for 31 years, and he has been able to see a few advantages to staying in the same place for a long time. One of the biggest advantages is that preaching to the same people for so long has caused him to preach on many of the passages and topics that pastors never preach on. This has added value to him and his congregation.

Max also loves the fact that he has a very long-standing and well-respected legacy within his community that is not only paying off for him but is paying off for his wife and kids now, too. His church has invited two of his three daughters to speak, and the community of people in their church are quick to support him and his family.

3. Happiness happens in unexpected ways

The world seems to be getting less and less happy. While researching his next book, Max learned that only one in three people today report that they are happy. So where has our happiness gone? And more importantly, how do we get it back?

One thing Max realized while researching for his book was that we become happy, ourselves, when we are making other people happy. So, when we give away something that brings joy to someone else, we too are becoming more joyful. Another unexpected way that we can become more happy is by listening. If we look at the life of Jesus, we see that he was very intentional about listening to those who were hurting.

Quotes from Episode 290

I knew it was time to pass on my role when what used to energize me about our church started to drain me. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

It might actually be disobedient or wrong to hang on in a position to which you’re not called anymore. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

Happiness happens when we give it away. @MaxLucadoClick To Tweet

Everywhere I look, somebody’s trying to make me unhappy so that I’ll buy their product. @MaxLucadoClick To Tweet

Saying no to speaking or to travel is really a good yes to my wife. @MaxLucadoClick To Tweet

Read or Download the Transcript for Episode 290

Looking for a key quote? More of a reader?

Read or download a free PDF transcript of this episode here.

Watch Back Episodes of The Podcast on YouTube

Select episodes of this podcast are now on YouTube. Our new YouTube Channel gives you a chance to watch some episodes, not just listen. We’ll add select episodes to YouTube as time goes on.

Help Your Church Grow Without Compromising Biblical Integrity

Ready to start preaching better sermons and reach the unchurched without selling out? Then it’s time to start using the right tips, lessons, and strategies to communicating better.

The Art of Better Preaching Course is a 12 session video training with a comprehensive, interactive workbook that will help you create, write, and deliver better sermons. The course contains the lessons Mark Clark (lead pastor of  Village Church, a growing mega-church in post-Christian Vancouver) and I have learned, taught, and used over decades of being professional communicators.

This is the complete course you need to start preaching better sermons, including:

7 preaching myths it’s time to bust forever
The 5 keys to preaching sermons to unchurched people (that will keep them coming back)
How to discover the power in the text (and use it to drive your sermon)
The specific characteristics of sermons that reach people in today’s world
Why you need to ditch your sermon notes (and how to do it far more easily than you think.)
How to keep your heart and mind fresh over the long run

And far more! Plus you get an interactive workbook and some bonus resources that will help you write amazing messages week after week.

In the Art of Better Preaching, Mark and I share everything we’ve learned about communicating in a way that will help your church grow without compromising biblical integrity. We cover detailed training on everything from interacting with the biblical text to delivering a talk without using notes, to writing killer bottom lines that people will remember for years.

Check it out today and gain instant access.

Subscribed Yet? 

Subscribe for free and never miss out on wisdom from world-class leaders like Brian Houston, Andy Stanley, Craig Groeschel, Nancy Duarte, Henry Cloud, Patrick Lencioni, Francis Chan, Ann Voskamp, Erwin McManus and many others.

Subscribe using your favorite podcast app via

Apple Podcasts

Spotify

Google Play

Stitcher

TuneIn

Spread the Word. Leave a Rating and Review

Hopefully, this episode has helped you lead like never before. That’s my goal. If you appreciated it, could you share the love?

The best way to do that is to rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts and leave us a brief review! You can do the same on Stitcher and on TuneIn as well.

Your ratings and reviews help us place the podcast in front of new leaders and listeners. Your feedback also lets me know how I can better serve you.

Thank you for being so awesome.

Next Episode: David Platt

There are so many deconversion stories away from Christianity these days. David Platt has seen some of the greatest suffering on earth and has again, recently, asked some of the toughest questions: In a universe governed by a good God, is hell really a place? Will so many people born into an earthly hell really end up in eternal hell? David shares how seeing profound suffering and asking those questions hasn’t led him away from faith but deeper into his faith. And, he shares what needs to change in Christianity is really going to impact the world.

Subscribe for free now and you won’t miss Episode 291.

The post CNLP 290: Max Lucado on What Causes Happiness, How to Be Happier, and How to Know When It’s Time to Leave Leadership appeared first on CareyNieuwhof.com.

Source: CNLP 290: Max Lucado on What Causes Happiness, How to Be Happier, and How to Know When It’s Time to Leave Leadership

The post CNLP 290: Max Lucado on What Causes Happiness, How to Be Happier, and How to Know When It’s Time to Leave Leadership appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Stan Rodda: A theme has been coming to the surface recently in my life. I have noticed it in my calls with my coach and texts with my accountability partner. That theme is…rest.

I’m sure many of you have found yourself in a situation like mine. You are in the middle of some great stuff. You are working hard, the to-do list is full. You’re having great conversations with people. Lives are being changed. You’re seeing momentum in your church or ministry.

In that season, it’s difficult to put down the laptop or notebook and take a break. Why? Because great stuff is happening. You have to ride that wave. Keep pushing the flywheel until it’s really rolling. You can almost feel it, the breakthrough is just on the other side of one more day, week or month of hard work.

Then it happens.

You realize you haven’t been taking your day off. You haven’t had a REAL vacation in years. All of a sudden it feels like everything is crashing down.

One of my goals is to always come back to the theme of rest. To help pastors and church leaders take a season of rest before it’s too late. Before a moral or financial failure. We have seen this too often in church leaders.

This week I was struck by Jim Burgeon, lead pastor at Flatirons Community Church in Boulder, Colorado. He posted a 10 minute video for his church to tell them about a six-month sabbatical his elders have told him to take. What I love about it is his honesty and openness. But what I love more than anything is that he is doing this now before it’s too late.

If you haven’t seen the video yet, take a look.

To be very clear: I respect Jim and the elders of Flatirons Community Church for this decision.

Here’s where rest intersects disciple making. Discipleship at its core is obedience to God and God calls us to Sabbath rest. He can do more with our six days of effort than we can if we work all seven. Let’s get ahead of burn out and moral failures in our lives and churches by recommitting to Sabbath rest as a matter of obedience to God. What is it going to take for us to make that a reality in our lives?

Here are five action steps that need to be taken.

Rediscover Sabbath Rest

I think sometimes we view time off as a weakness. If we step away to refuel, then we are weak and incapable of the responsibilities of leadership and making disciples. This couldn’t be further from the truth.

Spend some time studying Scripture and what God says about Sabbath. It’s a sign of strength and trust in God the Father. In obedience we declare that we trust God more than we trust ourselves. If we are honest with ourselves, this speaks more to what we believe about God than anything.

Small God = I can’t take time off, I need to work, God is incapable of doing work outside of my effort or I don’t trust Him to follow through on His part, my God is weak but I am strong.

Big God = God is capable, His grace is sufficient and He will cover for my weakness while I take time and enjoy some rest and fun, I trust Him to follow through on His part, my God is strong and I am weak.

Commit to Top Priorities Only

In other words, stop doing what doesn’t matter and what isn’t making more disciples. There are at least one million and one good programs out there for the church to do. If you are running twenty programs and are seeing no fruit in new people or your current people, it’s time to end those programs. If a small group of people get mad that the programs are going away, then they were more committed to a program than the mission of the church. That should be a clue as to the ineffectiveness and lack of health in that program.

Get Serious About Accountability

Who have you given the ability to come up to you after a Sunday and say, “Hey, you seem tired. What day are you taking off this week?” Who can speak into your life at that level? I believe every pastoral failure that makes the news can be traced to that person believing they were above accountability.

No one could tell them to slow down

No one could tell them they needed to rest

No one could tell them they were in danger

It’s easy for us to point fingers, scoff and run through the, “that will never happen to me,” scenarios when a pastor or church leader fails. It’s more difficult work to put ourselves under the authority of someone we trust to call us out when needed.

Discover What Brings You Joy And Happiness

What hobby or activity brings you to life? There are thousands of possible answers.

Hiking

Biking

Working out

Restoring old cars

Riding motorcycles

Painting

Listening to music

Walking

Designing

Photography

Eating good food

Traveling

Exploring new cities

Museums

etc…

For me, it’s a little bit of time on two wheels. I love that time of rest from work and reconnecting with God. Looking around at His creation, rolling through the hills of Virginia is a great time of spiritual refueling. Even my wife says I’m different after a ride.

Discover what brings you life, joy and happiness. Then fill a day with that. Allow your soul to rest and find refreshment in an activity that God has wired you to enjoy. Thank God for that time of fun and trust Him to do work while you rest.

Communicate Sabbath Rest With Your Team

Whatever day it is that you are choosing to give time to Sabbath rest, be sure to communicate that with your staff team. No matter how many you are responsible for, make sure they know you are unavailable that day. This does a couple things for you.

It gives you an added layer of accountability to actually take that day off and rest.

It leads by example to your team that they need to be doing the same.

Now when you ask your team if they are taking their day off and resting, they will take you seriously. They will know that it’s a matter of obedience to God because they will have seen it modeled.

If we are going to see a resurgence of the Gospel and a disciple making movement in our day, it is going to require a renewed commitment to Sabbath rest. We must see it is an act of obedience to God and trusting Him to do more than we can ask or imagine.

What would you add to help pastors and church leaders to get back to Sabbath rest?

Source: 5 Actions To Restore Sabbath Rest In Our Lives

The post 5 Actions To Restore Sabbath Rest In Our Lives appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Carey Nieuwhof: So you’re busy. Welcome to the club.

For too many of us, busy now means working 7 days a week.

One leader approached me a while back and said the one thing he knew would change everything for him was to stop working 7 days a week. The problem was, he had no idea how to do it.

My heart went out to him.

I don’t think I know a single leader who hasn’t struggled with working too many hours. And I know far too many who never take a full day off.

While I think over work will always be a struggle for most driven people (it has been for me), I think it’s a rising epidemic for most leaders.

So how do you change that? I’ll share some insights from my journey and would love to hear yours.

Two Truths No One Can Really Argue With

First, two things that are simply true in leadership:

1. You will never be done

This may not be the case when you start. I remember beginning in ministry in some very small churches and thinking “how on earth am I going to fill 40 hours?” I actually called people to see if there was more I could do.

As we grew I never suffered from the problem of boredom again.

In fact, a church of 100 can place just as many demands on ministry leaders as a church of 1000.  Sometimes more, because in a church of 100 people assume you have all the time in the world for them. Similarly, in any field, an organization of 10 people can place just as many demands on you as an organization of 1000 people.

You think you will make up for the demand by working more hours, or by working smarter, but that’s a dead end street.

So just admit it. Say it out loud. No matter how many hours I work, I will never be done.

An organization of 10 people can place just as many demands on you as an organization of 1000 people.Click To Tweet

2. The problem with needs based ministry is there are always more needs

You probably got into leadership because you care about people. And you want to help meet people’s needs.

I’ll never forget what my friend Reggie Joiner told me when I first met him. The problem with needs based ministry is there are always more needs. 

If your goal is to respond to every human need out there, you will never sleep. Just know that. You are fighting a battle you will lose every time.

And the biggest losers will be your family, whose needs will be ignored in the process.

The problem with needs based leadership is there are always more needs. You’re never done.Click To Tweet

7 Practical Tips to Help You Stop Working 7 Days a Week

So how do you de-escalate your hours, not make people angry and actually have time to refuel?

Well, this journey has taken me years, but here it is in seven bullet points:

1. Preplan your calendar with ‘slots’ for everything you need to do

Over a decade ago I moved to a fixed calendar. It’s the only reason I’m still sane today and can do what I’ve been called to do. By a fixed calendar I mean I pre-plan what I’m going to do and not going to in advance. 

I book no meetings as a rule on Mondays and Wednesdays. Those are message writing/series planning days. I also do much of the administration I need to do.

Tuesdays and Thursdays are meeting days. I meet with our staff and if anyone else is going to meet with me, it will be in the slots available on those days.

The power of this system is that when someone asks if you’re free to meet with them, you can honestly tell them you are not. Your message prep is extremely important, and if it’s in your calendar, you can tell them that unfortunately you’re not free Monday. If all you have is nothing booked it, you will almost always tell them you’ve got nothing going on and you’ll meet them.

And you’ll do your sermon prep or big project on Saturday when you should be home with your family. And, by the way, your organization will suffer because you didn’t spend the time you needed to on what was most important.

2. Book off-time in your calendar

Slot in family time, personal time, devotional time, exercise time and time to just be. Write your day off in your calendar.

Then when someone asks you if you are free, you say “Unfortunately, I’m not.” Again, if you think rest isn’t important, ask the question again once you’re in full fledged burnout (here are 9 signs you’re getting there).

And if you have pre-determined slots available for meeting people in the weeks ahead, you can offer them one of those.

3. Learn to ask yourself, “Is it truly an emergency and can only I help?”

If you lead in a larger church, this isn’t the issue it used to be. But when our church was smaller, people always looked to me for pastoral care (we’ve switched most of our care to groups and outside counselling, a move I can’t recommend highly enough).

The challenge is everyone who asks you to meet with them wants to meet with you now because it’s so important and they’re in crisis and only you can help.

In those moments, remind yourself that what feels like an emergency to them might not actually be an emergency.  Their marriage didn’t get terrible overnight, it’s been sliding for years. Ask one more question, and you might discover that X has been in the hospital for a week and will be there for another week.

Too many church leaders give up their personal time and family time for crises that aren’t really crises. Pastors of churches particularly suffer from this. (Here’s a post on 5 pastoral emergencies that aren’t actually emergencies.)

And then ask yourself (especially if you want your church to grow), am I the only person who can really help? Truth is I am sometimes the person who can least help. They need a counsellor. Or a doctor. Or someone from their community group to visit.

If you are the only person who can help, try this: “I’m sorry to hear that. I have some time available Monday, can we meet then?” You’ll be shocked at how many times the person immediately says “Sure, no problem.”

Too many leaders give up their family time for crises that aren’t really crises.Click To Tweet

4. Power down

The problem is just as much you as it is them, isn’t it. You’re addicted to your phone. I am.

So power down. I’ve moved my email app to a third screen on my phone so I don’t look at it unless I intentionally want too. Almost all notifications on my phone are disabled and 95% of the time my phone is on do not disturb.

Have some moments in your life and leadership when you’re gloriously unavailable.

People expect you to take time off. So when you’re off, be off.

Have some moments in your life and leadership when you’re gloriously unavailable. People expect you to take time off. So when you’re off, be off. Click To Tweet

5. Tell people the truth…they’ll be happy for you

Maybe this is just me, but for years I felt guilty about telling people I was taking a day off. I know, only crazy people think like that, but I’m a crazy person.

Sometimes I would say things like “I’ve been working for a month without a day off so I really need to take it.”

Seriously. What is wrong with me that I need to justify time off?

So next time you’re off or need to be off, just tell them…”Oh you know, that’s my day off…Can we do it another time?”

You know what? They’ll be thrilled for you. At least normal people will.

6. Create categories of things you will no longer do

As your ministry or organization grows and you have more responsibility, you need to regularly decide what you are simply no longer going to do.

The best way I know how to do this is to think in categories.

Personally,

I schedule meaningful time with my direct reports and top leaders.

I schedule less time for everyone else.

I leave time open for people who don’t go to church.

I don’t do individual coaching, but I coach thousands of leaders each year through my online courses.

I don’t do counselling.

I don’t do many weddings or funerals.

I say no to most speaking requests, but choose a few that position me in front of leaders rather than people. I’d rather speak in front of 100 leaders than 1000 people. It just goes further in terms of impact and the good it does.

I realize many people will disagree with these choices, but they have helped me lead at a much higher level that’s generally very healthy and sustainable.

And I have time for myself and my family and time to pursue hobbies like writing. Plus it allows me to spend the majority of my working time doing what I’m best at and what most moves the mission forward.

If you have too much to do, start eliminating categories of things instead of just selected things.

If you have too much to do, start eliminating categories of things instead of just selected things. Click To Tweet

7. Learn to Say No Nicely

I hate saying no. I’d love to say yes to everyone. But I would be dead and they would not be helped.

I wrote this post outlining a six step strategy on how to say no nicely.

I also need to confess that I have a secret weapon. I have a great assistant and team around me. Sometimes I joke that I pay them to say no all day long. They’re good and it and so nice that when they says no on my behalf people feel like they said yes. I’m not kidding.

The transferable principle is that if you’re in a larger organization and can have an assistant or team, find people who excel at saying no and setting boundaries, nicely.  It’s an amazing gift…not just to you but to the entire organization. And if you don’t have a budget for that, my guess is you can even find a volunteer who will help you by handling your calendar or hire a very part time person like I have using a service like this.

A final word: this needs constant revisiting. I’m about to review all my outside and inside commitments again next month and start cutting again. You are never done. As more opportunities arise, you need to be relentless in what you say no to…even if you say it nicely.

Want to Go Deeper? How to Crush Your Goals and Get Your Family Time Back

Want to find far more time at work and at home?  Want to really crack not just getting a day off, but finding more time for what matters most every single day?

It’s very possible…and I’d love to help you get on top of your everything so you can get your life and leadership back.

If you’re trying to find the time for what matters most in life, my High Impact Leader course, is my online, on-demand course designed to help you get time, energy and priorities working in your favour.

Many leaders who have taken it are recovering 3 productive hours a day.  That’s about 1000 hours of found time each year. That’s a lot of time for what matters most.

Here are what some alumni are saying about The High Impact Leader Course”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you for providing the course again. It has absolutely made an impact in my life and family already that I can’t even describe.” – First Priority, Clayton County, North Carolina

“Carey’s course was the perfect way for our team to prepare for the new year. Our team, both collectively and individually, took a fresh look at maximizing our time and leadership gifts for the year ahead. I highly recommend this leadership development resource for you and your team.” Jeff Henderson, Gwinnett Church, Atlanta Georgia

“A lot of books and programs make big promises and cannot deliver but this is not one of them. I have read so many books and watched videos on productivity but the way you approach it and teach is helpful and has changed my work week in ministry in amazing ways.” Chris Sloan, Tanglewood Church, Kingston, North Carolina

“Just wow.  Thank you, thank you.” Dave Campbell, Invitation Church, Sioux Falls South Dakota

“A game changer.” Pam Perkins, Red Rock Church, Colorado Springs, Colorado

Curious? Want to beat overwhelm and have the time to reinvent yourself?

Click here to learn more or get instant access.

I hope this helps.

In the meantime, what has helped you stop working 7 days a week?

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Source: 7 Practical Tips to Help You Stop Working 7 Days a Week

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