By: Carey Nieuwhof

Let me guess. You feel like you really need to de-stress.

2020 has been unreal, and almost unbelievably trying—far different than any year you’ve led through before.

Every leader I talk to is tired. Well, more than just tired. Stressed. Deeply stressed.

And kind of exhausted.

There’s a fatigue that comes with crisis that’s a little hard to describe.

The adrenaline that got you through the first month gave way to the sustained drone of decision after decision, assault after assault, and disappointment after disappointment.

So you’ve lived for your summer break. I get it.

Everybody has.

There’s a fatigue that comes with crisis that’s a little hard to describe.Click To Tweet

Now the bad news. And as tough as it is to hear, your time off this summer probably won’t be enough to refuel you or even fully destress you.

Yeah, I know.

In fact, if you look back on your leadership, you probably already know that you rarely if ever completely destress on your time off. If you’re not sure about that, just ask your spouse or kids. They’ll tell you what it’s like to vacation with you.

And even if you get a few fleeting glimpses of peace at some point in your weeks off, they usually evaporate the moment you head back to work. It’s like two weeks of progress get erased within minutes of heading back to work.

So two questions:

First, “why?”

And second, “what should you do?”

Let’s tackle each in turn.

Why Doesn’t Time Off ‘Work’?

1. Time Off Won’t Heal You When Your Problem Is How You Spend Your Time On

The problem with most leaders is not how we spend our time off. It’s how we spend our time on.

I learned the lesson of time off that doesn’t refuel you the hard way. The worst summer of my life happened back in 2006.

Personally, after 11 years in leadership, I was burning out. I suspected burnout but I thought I could stop it with a vacation, because, you know, I’m strong like that and only weak people burn out. (Yes I know, but tell that to young me who didn’t listen well.)

I took three weeks off that July. I was convinced I would heal and everything would be back to normal by August 1st.

What scared me to death that year is that instead of getting better during my vacation, I got worse.

I moved into a deep slide and cratered out in August…a burnout deep enough that it took me months to get out of and then a few years to finally shake.

You know what I learned in that season (along with about 1 million other lessons)?

How I spent my time off wasn’t the solution, because how I spend my time off wasn’t my problem.

Your time off can’t save you if the problem is how you spend your time on.

Your time off can’t save you if the problem is how you spend your time on.Click To Tweet

The problem for most exhausted and depleted leaders isn’t how you spend your time off, it’s how you spend your time on.

Back in 2006, my crisis was personal. I was living at an unstainable pace. As the church I led grew, my formula was more people equals more hours. And that’s fundamentally unsustainable.

Today, the crisis is global and we’re all going through it. If the formula is more crisis equals more hours, we’re all doomed as leaders.  Sure, the initial stages of a crisis require long hours and hard decisions. But when you head into a prolonged crisis, well, you need a new strategy.

Which takes us back to this summer: when you’re exhausted, how you spend your time off isn’t the solution. How you spend your time on is.

The initial stages of a crisis require long hours and hard decisions. But when you head into a prolonged crisis, well, you need a new strategy.Click To Tweet

2. This is Why Sabbaticals and Leaves Generally Don’t Solve Burnout

You might be thinking, Exactly, Carey—which is why I need a sabbatical or leave of some kind. 

Well, maybe. But probably not.

For years I’ve puzzled over why so many sabbaticals and other forms of leave generally don’t solve burnout.

I can’t tell you the number of leaders I’ve known on the verge of burnout who have taken a sabbatical to deal with their stress or fatigue, get better, and then come back only to feel as bad or worse within months of their return. And then often, they leave—for good.

Although I’ve never taken a Sabbatical or extended leave, I think they can be great when they have a defined purpose and you’re not running into them or back out of them into a frantically unsustainable life.

A Sabbatical isn’t the solution for an unsustainable pace. A sustainable pace is the solution for an unsustainable pace.

When the way you’re living and leading is broken, all the time in the world off won’t fix it.

When the way you’re living and leading is broken, all the time in the world off won’t fix it. Click To Tweet

So…What Will Help?

If the problem is how you spend your time on, here are a few things that can help.

First, when you’re off, take some time to take stock of what happened.

You have been through so much and my guess is you’ve hardly stopped to process it.

I found myself unusually tired a few weeks ago. There was nothing ‘wrong’ with my schedule. I’d taken a full weekend off,  and my day wasn’t jammed full with meetings.

I actually had writing time scheduled in my calendar, which is something I love, and it was designed to help me finish writing a new course on leading a better team we’re launching in a few months.

But I was struggling to get motivated. I was far more tired than I should be.

When I wondered what was going on, I realized that although I love writing and producing online courses for leaders, I was writing my fourth course in four months, something I’d never done before.

That, on top of all the crisis leadership all of us have been through left me feeling, well, not myself.

In the end, the course production and filming went really well, but the lesson wasn’t lost.

What’s the best thing to do about that? Well, name it, surrender it and make a note to file for the future you that writing and producing four courses in four months is super taxing.

Until you understand why you’re tired, it’s hard to figure out how not to get that tired.

So what’s making you tired?

If your answer is everything, take a little more time to break it down. You’ll likely discover some things weigh more heavily than others.

Until you understand why you’re tired, it’s hard to figure out how not to get that tired.Click To Tweet

Finally, grieve your losses. A mentor once told me that ministry is a series of ungrieved losses. Oh man, is he right.

When he shared that with me I realized how many losses I’d experienced that I never grieved (as small as someone leaving your church, which isn’t that small).

Ministry is a series of ungrieved losses. So is life.

Do you know how much loss you’ve experienced since March?

Take some time to pray through them, grieve through them, and maybe even sit down with a good friend or therapist to process it all.

You’ll be glad you did.

Ministry is a series of ungrieved losses. So is life. Click To Tweet

With all that processed during the relative quiet of summer, how do you avoid being eaten alive heading back into leadership?

While I have a deep and robust strategy that’s helped me deal with everything life and leadership have thrown at me for years now, here are three things that can help right now.

1. Make Some Categorical Decisions

Categorical decision making is a superpower for leaders who have too much to do, which these days is most leaders.

By default, you make decisions one by one in leadership…as they come at you or need to be made.

One of the best ways to simplify decision making is to think in categories.

For example, when the COVID crisis hit, I had a lot of internal decisions to make as a leader (things my organization needed to do to survive), and soon I was faced with a bunch of requests for podcast interviews, webinar appearances, online events and even to join staff meetings virtually.

At first, my team and I looked at each request individually, but as they piled up (often a half dozen requests a day), we moved to categorical decision making. I decided to politely decline all podcast interviews, virtual events, webinars, online events of staff meetings.

Done, decision made.

We made a couple of exceptions, but not many.

The result? My team had clarity. I had clarity. And people understood.

Plus, I had time to work on some big projects I needed to get done.

Heading back into leadership, what things can you categorically eliminate?

This will take you a while to think through, but over the years I’ve done things like categorically eliminate doing weddings and funerals, pastoral visitation,  breakfast meetings (I’m most productive in the morning), lunch meetings or even meetings over an hour (and much more).

This will also force you to create systems for these important things that are not dependent on you and far more deeply empower your team.

I always get asked Do you make exceptions? And yes, I do.

I’ve done a few weddings, some visitations, a few funerals and even the odd breakfast meeting. But the exceptions are so much easier to manage than the deluge of yesses that probably should have been nos. And if I participate in your wedding, it’s probably because you’re on my staff or are family, a pretty easy exception to explain.

And ideally, your elimination of one category should free up time to focus on something more important or strategic. Another way to think about it is to reach more people, I need to eliminate X. 

If you’re skittish or worry about FOMO, try this: make it time-limited. In other words, for three months I’ll do no breakfast meetings. Or until the end of the year, I won’t do outside projects or requests.

Categorical decision-making saves mental energy and a tremendous amount of time because you already made the decision. Case closed. Move on.

Categorical decision-making saves mental energy and a tremendous amount of time because you already made the decision. Case closed. Move on.Click To Tweet

2. Simplify, Simplify, Simplify

This one’s easy to understand and very difficult to do.

At the best of times, complexity is your enemy. And many leaders have a strategy that’s overly complex.

Complexity doesn’t scale, and at a certain level, it’s also exhausting.

Complexity doesn’t scale, and at a certain level, it’s also exhausting. Click To Tweet

Simple is not simplistic.

As Woody Guthrie is quoted as saying, “Any fool can make something complicated. It takes a genius to make it simple.”

Great leaders stick with a problem or idea long enough and engage it deeply enough to clear away the fog and reduce the concept to its simplest forms so anyone can understand it and implement it.

Ask yourself, what things can you stop doing so you can start doing more important things?

A simple, leaner model will likely help you thrive in complicated times.

One easy cut from most churches or organizations is anything you have to ‘manufacture’ energy for (I explain that here).

The more complex the world becomes, the simpler your approach to it needs to be.

The more complex the world becomes, the simpler your approach to it needs to be.Click To Tweet

3. Ditch The Endless WorkDay/WorkWeek

If you haven’t worked from home as much in the past as you are presently, the boundaries between work and home and likely as blurry as they’ve ever been.

I’ve been working from home part of the time for much of the last 25 years and full-time for the last five. It took me years to figure out how to do it well, but I’m more convinced than ever that you need a strategy to make sure your work doesn’t envelop your life.

Technology has not made this simpler.

You’re watching Disney+ with your daughter after dinner and a co-worker texts you about your expense report.

You used to go to the office, but thanks to technology, now the office goes to you. And it’s fully capable of interrupting you any time, anywhere, even on vacation.

Because I love what I get to do, I’ve had to force myself to make hard stops, putting my laptop away, turning off all notifications on my device, moving my phone out of my bedroom at night, and deciding that some things can wait.

Want a good little hack to help you break your work/technology addiction? Get a hobby.

You’ll get so engrossed in it that you’ll lose the desire to even check your phone.

You used to go to the office, but thanks to technology, now the office goes to you. And it’s fully capable of interrupting you any time, anywhere, even on vacation.Click To Tweet

Something To Focus On

Since I burned out, my mantra has been to try to figure out a way to live in a way today that will help you thrive tomorrow.

I think that’s a good principle. I don’t always get it right, but when I do, things are so much better.

If you’re not thriving—and many leaders aren’t, even in the best of times—adjust today to improve tomorrow.

Living in a way today that will help you thrive tomorrow will help you win the marathon ahead.

Simplify the Changes You’re Going To Make…

How are you going to make the change you need to make without exhausting yourself or your team?

As complex as things are, having a simple framework to navigate the change will make the task ahead much easier.

If you want to position yourself for the future, my brand new online training, the 30-Day Pivot, will show you how to develop your agility as a leader and as an organization to position yourself for growth.

The 30-Day Pivot is a simple 3-step process you and your team can utilize every as often as every 30 days to respond to the change around you and capitalize on it.

In the 30-Day Pivot, you’ll learn:

A simple 3-step process your team can use to arrive at your next pivot in 90 minutes or less.
An approach that fosters team-generated innovation.
An implementation and evaluation framework that will help your team move quickly and accurately.

I’ve led teams through multiple pivots, and in the 30 Day Pivot, I show you the strategy and framework you need to make quick, accurate and responsive moves that can position your organization for growth, even in the midst of deep uncertainty and change.

Some organizations and churches will thrive in the new normal.

Others won’t.

While the future is uncertain, yours doesn’t have to be.

What Helps You?

What helps you figure out the relationship between time off and time on?

How do you refuel in every season?

Scroll down and leave a comment!

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Source: Why Your Time Off Will Never Be Enough to Truly DeStress You

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by unSeminary: This summer millions of children and youth across the country will attend a Christian camp. While this subculture has its own robust ecosystem of conferences, books, and thought leaders, there seems to be a strange disconnect between local churches and Christian camping ministries. From my perspective, local churches miss out on significant benefits that come from working closely with the Christian camps in their communities (especially those connected to people affiliated with their church).

Now, I’m completely biased because I have a deep, decades-long connection with a Christian camp called Camp Mini-Yo-We, located in the heart of Muskoka. I’ve always encouraged church staff to become more engaged with Christian camps, directed families to get plugged into Christian camps that are the right fit for them, and worked to see youth become involved with these amazing ministries as young leaders. I firmly believe that Christian camps are ministries that churches should work with closely—and here’s why:

Camps reach unchurched families.

Unchurched families value what Christian camps are doing. Not only do they allow these camps to teach and host their kids, they even pay them to do it! Christian camps take different approaches to how they position themselves in the broader marketplace, but the vast majority of these camps see unchurched families come to their programs more readily than weekend church services do.

This is an incredibly rich resource for local church leaders to learn from. Having conversations with Christian camp leaders to understand how they’re engaging the community and impacting unchurched families will help church leaders to wrestle with and think about their own ministries. This is vital: If we’re going to continue to see people move closer to Jesus, we need to concern ourselves with how we’re helping young people make steps toward the church. We’ve all seen the statistics that the vast majority of people make the decision to follow Christ at an early age. Christian camps are a powerhouse for seeing young people take steps closer to Christ, regardless of their background. We all can learn from how these organizations relate to families in our communities.

Christian camps develop young leaders.

All Christian camps are a leadership development pipeline in motion. In fact, the only way these organizations are able to self-perpetuate is by turning young campers into cabin leaders and then staff who will push the ministry forward. When you take an up-close look at any Christian camp, you’ll see this robust leadership process in action.

Christian camps are particularly effective at developing next-generation leaders through life changing adventures in God’s creation. These ministries view leadership development holistically rather than as something that happens in a classroom or by reading books or watching videos. Christian camping leaders consistently develop the next generation of leaders through lifestyle-based ministries that target whole-person development of spiritual life, physical life, emotional life, and social life.

Camps provide compelling volunteer experiences.

Your church lives and dies on the back of its ability to attract, keep, and multiply volunteers. These folks are willing to show up for zero pay and make the ministry happen. In fact, this is one of the greatest things about the local church all over the world: it’s the world’s most prolific volunteer machine.

Christian camps provide volunteer experiences where adults and young leaders work tremendously hard in a compelling context that keeps them coming back for more. More than just handing out programs or greeting at the door, camps are full of a variety of roles on both the facility side and within the programs. As church leaders, we could learn from this mixture of meaningful work, connection to the mission, and good old-fashioned fun as the ingredients of compelling volunteer experiences.

Camps continue to stay relevant.

If you find a Christian camp within a few hours’ drive of your church—one that’s growing and reaching new people—it would be worth your time to ask, “What is it that God’s using to grow their organization?” Because of the constant need to feed these organizations with new campers and guests, camps work hard to stay relevant and current every single year. This includes adjusting their programs to meet the needs of the market. It involves freshening up or reinventing old programs, scrapping things that no longer work, and asking their people what it is that they would like to do in the future.

From a church leadership perspective, this would be a valuable habit for us to integrate into our churches. We need to keep our view on the horizon and dig into what it means to stay current with the communities we’re serving. Sure, camps have a financial need to stay current, but while churches may not have the same fiscal immediacy, churches will lose long-term effectiveness if they’re unable to connect with new audiences on a regular basis.

Camps provide holistic ministry.

Camps provide a view of the Christian life that goes beyond sitting in rows or watching videos.

Christian camps really do portray what it means to follow Christ in a 24/7 sort of way. I’ve often joked that “Jesus at church” is sometimes kind of boring and stale. He has weird mismatched colored rooms in the basement and might even use flannel graphs to try to communicate. On the other hand, “Jesus at camp” knows how to drive the latest wakeboarding boat or is ready to take you on a rock-climbing adventure. That portrayal of what it means to follow Jesus is an engaging and compelling one.

Beyond the fun experiences though, this idea of living out our faith in community with each other is a powerful teaching mechanism that drives people to a deeper faith experience. This type of community is an intrinsic and core characteristic of Christian camps, and it enables people to tap into that deeper faith life in different ways.

Camps scale relationships well.

If you visit a growing Christian camp this summer (which I strongly recommend you take the time to do), what you’ll find is an intricate balance of relationships in almost-perfect harmony seeking to fulfill the mission that God has called these organizations to achieve. Camps are relational ministries.

They’ve figured out that friendship is shared experience, so they develop a series of shared experiences with the people who come into their sphere of influence. Camps do this in order to build a bridge for presenting the gospel and help people get a clearer sense of what it means to follow Jesus. Look closely at how Christian camps do relationships at scale, and you’ll get a clearer picture of what your church should be doing to reach more people and get them plugged in.

Camp is fun!

Camps offer fun—it really is their product.

It’s the thing they sell to people to convince them that they should leave their kids in the camp’s hands on a regular basis. Camps at their core are fun factories, but they are also capable of producing a deeper joy during their day to day activities. The word “gospel” literally means “good news,” and camps have done an excellent job of portraying what that good news looks like on a daily basis. They’ve figured out how to manufacture an enjoyable day. Even if it’s raining and the sun hasn’t shone in three days, great camp leaders always figure out how to turn that around into the most amazing experience possible for their guests, all the while demonstrating the good news of Jesus through that fun!

Too many times the local church is seen as stale or disconnected from the community; fun is an amazing bridge to build incredible connections with people. It’s disarming, which makes fun a strategic tool that helps people who don’t normally attend our churches become willing to lean in and learn more.

What have you learned from Christian camps?

I’d love for you to leave a comment below on lessons that you’ve learned from Christian camps over the years. I’d also love for you to shout out to the Christian camp that you’ve been a part of or encouraged your people to be connected to!

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Source: 7 Reasons Your Church Should Partner with A Christian Camp

The post 7 Reasons Your Church Should Partner with A Christian Camp appeared first on Passion for Planting.