by Stan Rodda: Something really interesting jumped out at me as I was reading Matthew 10 the other day. The first four verses of that chapter stood out to me unlike ever before and God showed me something I need to think more about. He drew my attention to finishing well in life and ministry through one name, Judas Iscariot.

Summoning His twelve disciples, He gave them authority over unclean spirits, to drive them out and to heal every disease and sickness. These are the names of the twelve apostles: First, Simon, who is called Peter, and Andrew his brother; James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother; Philip and Bartholomew; Thomas an dMatthew the tax collector; James the son of Alphaeus, and Thaddaeus; Simon the Zealot, and Judas Iscariot, who also betrayed Him. [Matthew 10:1-4 CSB]

This is super cool. The disciples were given authority and power, to cast out demons, to heal every affliction, sickness and disease. How powerful is that? What would it have been like to experience that? And those that were chosen to bear this authority and power, are listed by name. And the very last name listed struck me; Judas Iscariot, who also betrayed Him.

Maybe I’ve never thought about this before. Maybe I’ve just forgotten. Judas was given the power and authority to cast out demons, cleanse lepers and heal the sick. He was a part of the miraculous alongside the other disciples and Jesus Himself. For years he walked in this circle. And I thought to myself, “How did it get to the place where he kills himself?” How does a guy like that with power and authority end up betraying Jesus and hanging himself in a field, dying alone.

The thought occurred to me that Judas simply didn’t finish well. Maybe it was the pride of a man that made him feel that he could never fall. Maybe there was more to it than that. But the reality is that Judas was a man, just like me. He was human, just like all of us. And it can be very easy to look down on him for what he did, but there is a certain reality to all of this.

Father, may I never become so prideful that I think I’m above Judas. That I’m above finishing well.

I’m no better than Judas. I have the same capacity of Judas to come up short in the end. To not show up when I should have. I have the same capacity to not end well in my parenting. I have the same capacity to not end well in my marriage if I don’t pay attention. I’m not above the sin of pride and not finishing my life and ministry well. I’m not above ending poorly in my finances.

Maybe you find yourself in a place like that right now.

1. Your Marriage

Maybe your marriage has been lifeless for decades. Finishing well is the humility to admit you need a counselor. That professional help may be the only thing that saves your marriage.

2. Your Parenting

Maybe you only have a couple months left with a Senior who is graduating soon. But this year you don’t get to finish the way you thought because graduation parties and prom are cancelled. Finishing well with them may look like confronting past mistakes before they leave the house and head to college. How do you finish well as a mom or dad in the last couple months before your child leaves the house.

3. Your Ministry

Maybe you are in a ministry that makes you feel like you’re drowning. I have been there and it’s not easy. Maybe God is beginning to release you from that place, but you still have to finish. Finishing well looks a lot like humility, to let pains and hurts go that need to be let go. Forgiving when it’s difficult. Your biggest call and act of obedience right now in ministry may simply be, “Finish well.”

May I encourage you as you strive to finish well in your season of life.

Pursue Humility Like Your Life Depended On It

Adopt the same attitude as that of Christ Jesus…He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death. [Philippians 2:5, 8 CSB]

Jesus, may I become more like you. Obedient to death. Finishing well. Have the humility to admit that I don’t have all the answers. I’m no better than Judas. I’m no better than Thomas who doubted. I’m no better than Peter who denied. I’m not above them. I have the same capacity to sin and for pride to keep me from finishing well as any other believer in history. Father, give me humility to realize I have the same capacity as these people.

The humility to admit I need counseling.

The humility to admit I need accountability.

The humility to admit I need coaching.

Pursue Jesus Like Your Life Depended On It

I am the vine; you are the branches. The one who remains in Me and I in him produces much fruit, because you can do nothing without Me. [John 15:5 CSB]

Are you caring for your time with Christ? Are you daily connecting with Him in Scripture and prayer? Not the kind where you’re really trying to finish a sermon, training or class. Not that kind. The kind where you are completely open and truthful with King Jesus! Where you open yourself up to obedience and transformation. Jesus, what do you have for me in Scripture today? How may I obey you today?

King Jesus, draw near to me as I draw near to You! I am desperate without You. I can do NOTHING without you. You are my entire life!

If you’re struggling to finish well in a season of life and don’t have anyone to talk to, please reach out. We all need community and accountability to finish well in life. May God grant each of us the humility to finish well.

Let’s take Kingdom territory!

Source: What Judas Taught Me About Life & Ministry

The post What Judas Taught Me About Life & Ministry appeared first on Passion for Planting.

Source: The Underestimated, Secret Power of Humility

The post The Underestimated, Secret Power of Humility appeared first on Passion for Planting.

Source: Life: It’s STILL Not About You

The post Life: It’s STILL Not About You appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Carey Nieuwhof: John Ortberg has a brand new podcast, What Were You Thinking? Today, we flip the mic, and John interviews Carey Nieuwhof about workaholism, how to be appropriately vulnerable about your story, and finding God when things get tough in life and leadership.

Welcome to Episode 307 of the podcast. Listen and access the show notes below or search for the Carey Nieuwhof Leadership Podcast on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts and listen for free.

Guest Links

Twitter | Facebook | Instagram | What Were You Thinking?

Episode Links

What if, in 40 days, you could grow your small groups in your church by 40%? Based on Pastor Zach Zehnder’s book, The Red Letter Challenge is a 40-day turnkey church campaign that centers around making more effective disciples of Jesus. Go to RedLetterChallenge.com/Carey to find church packages ready to go for you.

The High Impact Workplace

10 Million Podcast Downloads Giveaway

Managing Leadership Anxiety by Steve Cuss

Didn’t See It Coming by Carey Nieuwhof

The Genesee Diary by Henry Nouwen

3 Insights from John and Carey

1. Burnout is a factor for all driven people

Most leaders eventually hit a wall, whether it’s clinical burnout, their marriage falling apart, their relationship with their kids deteriorating, or realizing they simply need to delegate. Every driven leader gets there. When they hit this wall, they realize that a change needs to be made, but most have no clue what that change is.

Although it’s not the same for everyone, it is almost always tied to a lie that a leader believes. Carey has learned that he, as a leader, was believing that his performance defined his worth. This led to him trying to perform more and more until he hit his wall. Ever since, he has been intentional about living in a way today that will help him thrive tomorrow.

2. The senior leader sets the culture

Over many years of thinking and inspecting his own leadership, Carey has learned that unhealthy leaders create unhealthy cultures. He knows this because he used to be that unhealthy leader. Now, he has spent years changing how he views the purpose of work in his and his team’s lives.

He used to think that he uses people to get work done, and that led to an unhealthy culture. Now, he has realized that he is trying to use work to grow the people that work there. In a healthy culture, people are the goal, not the work.

3. The appropriate level of vulnerability to have from the stage is…

Carey has learned that the voice and position we communicate from makes a massive impact on whether the message is helpful or not. Many leaders naturally take a position where they are up on top of a mountain, and if you want access to them, you have to come sit at their feet. Carey has learned that this position doesn’t work. People admire your strengths but they resonate with your weaknesses.

So what voice does Carey use? He uses a voice that is “ in the field” with the reader. This voice is saying, “I know this is hard, I struggle too, but maybe making this change will help us.” When Carey uses this voice, he is much more engaged with his audience.

Quotes from Episode 307

Spiritual health is often a casualty of ministry and leadership. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

When you’re winning at church and losing at home, you’re losing. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

How do I live in a way today that will help me thrive tomorrow? @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

The office is something we used to go to, and now the office goes to us. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

By the time this race is over, I want the people closest to me to be the people who are most grateful for me. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

People are most tempted to quit moments before their critical breakthrough. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

The health of the organization is directly linked to the health of the senior leader. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

Unhealthy leaders create unhealthy cultures. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

Sometimes burnout is God’s will for your life because he wants to do a redirection. @johnortbergClick To Tweet

If God wants to go deep. It’s because he wants to take you far. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

You cannot over communicate. @cnieuwhofClick To Tweet

Read or Download the Transcript for Episode 307

Looking for a key quote? More of a reader?

Read or download a free PDF transcript of this episode here.

Watch Back Episodes of The Podcast on YouTube

Select episodes of this podcast are now on YouTube. Our new YouTube Channel gives you a chance to watch some episodes, not just listen. We’ll add select episodes to YouTube as time goes on.

INTRODUCING THE HIGH IMPACT WORKPLACE
(AND MY FREE COACHING GUIDE)

There’s a talent war going on for the best leaders, a generational divide at work, and, according to Gallup, 70% of all workers are disengaged at work (meaning that they show up and only do the bare minimum.)

Introducing The High Impact Workplace, a new online, on-demand course where I show you what’s changing in the workplace and how to respond. As a founder and senior leader myself, I’ll share a strategy that will help you engage even the best and most gifted young leaders at work.

In the course, I’ll give you the exact strategies you need to:

Attract and keep high capacity leaders who would otherwise start their own businesses.
Identify and leverage the currency that motivates young leaders.
Navigate flexible work arrangements that result in deeper productivity.
Master the 5 questions every great manager asks their team for deeper engagement.
Discover how to create workplace environments that multiple generations can thrive in.
Learn how to keep your company or organization relevant to the next generation of leaders.

The High Impact Workplace will give you the edge you need to create the best team you can moving forward in an age where 8-4 doesn’t work anymore (just ask any young leader about that).

Enrollment to the course is only open for a few days and only available now at this low price. So hurry!

To learn more or get access today to the High Impact Workplace, click here.

Subscribed Yet? 

Subscribe for free and never miss out on wisdom from world-class leaders like Brian Houston, Andy Stanley, Craig Groeschel, Nancy Duarte, Henry Cloud, Patrick Lencioni, Francis Chan, Ann Voskamp, Erwin McManus and many others.

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Spread the Word. Leave a Rating and Review

Hopefully, this episode has helped you lead like never before. That’s my goal. If you appreciated it, could you share the love?

The best way to do that is to rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts and leave us a brief review! You can do the same on Stitcher and on TuneIn as well.

Your ratings and reviews help us place the podcast in front of new leaders and listeners. Your feedback also lets me know how I can better serve you.

Thank you for being so awesome.

Next Episode: Larry Osborne

Larry Osborne shares 4 decades of wisdom with leaders on everything from how to connect high capacity leaders, to what to do if you wanted to make a million dollars, to questions you should ask other leaders, to meeting dynamics on how to handle him. Carey spends almost the entire episode pitching some of his favorite Larry Osborne quotes back to Larry and having Larry expound on them. The results are fascinating.

Subscribe for free now and you won’t miss Episode 308.

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Source: CNLP 307: John Ortberg and Carey Nieuwhof on Workaholism, How to Be Appropriately Vulnerable, and Finding God When Things are Bad in Leadership

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by Discipleship.org: Four people were on a plane when it suddenly lost power and started falling toward the ground. The pilot got on the radio to announce an even bigger problem: “There are four of us, but only three parachutes. It’s my plane and my parachutes, so I’m going to take one of them.”

The three who were left—a professor, an elderly pastor, and a young traveler—were faced with a dilemma. The brilliant professor jumped to his feet and said, “I am one of the greatest minds in the country. I must survive. I’m taking one of the parachutes.” The others agreed and he launched himself out.

The pastor turned to the young traveler and said, “I’ve lived a long life and I don’t fear death. You take the last parachute.” But the young traveler stopped him mid-sentence by saying, “No, it’s fine. That brilliant professor just jumped out with my backpack strapped on!”

Wisdom means seeing more than just what is right in front of you. If we want to live as wise men and women, we must see things from God’s viewpoint. As you grow in your knowledge and understanding of the principles and precepts of God’s Word and apply to them to real-life situations, you will become more skillful and successful in your responsibilities.

One of the ways we can see ourselves from God’s viewpoint is outlined in Hebrews 12:1-3. Notice that, according to the author, we are runners in God’s race.

Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every hindrance and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, keeping our eyes on Jesus, the source and perfecter of our faith. For the joy that lay before him, he endured the cross, despising the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

As we consider this passage in this blog series, we will notice that there are three aspects that we need to focus on if we want to run our race wisely:

Preparation for the Race
Perseverance In the Race
Priority During the Race

This blog is from our partner Replicate. Sign up here to get updates sent to your inbox about ministries like theirs so you can grow as a disciple maker.

We Must Prepare for the Race

Running requires all kinds of training, discipline, and a rigorous protocol of diet and sleep. In the same way, our faith journey requires a single-minded, wholehearted devotion and determination if we are to run the race with endurance.

Verse One shows us two things we need to watch out for:

Every Hindrance

The writer of Hebrews tells us that if we want to endure and finish the race God has set before us, we must set aside every hindrance or “weight” that could drag us down.

Throughout Hebrews, the author repeatedly tells us that “Christ is better.” So as he writes to the Hebrews, one of the things Christ is better than is the Old Covenant. He admonishes them to lay aside this weight and embrace the new and living way that Jesus provides. His new covenant—accomplished through His blood—is superior to the old one!

We can do this two ways today:

Lay aside the law and embrace grace
Lay aside anything that hinders our faith journey

There are things in our lives that hinder or distract us from running with a single-minded devotion to Christ. They may not be bad in and of themselves, but they keep us from pursuing Christ with purpose and power. In your own life, what is something that keeps you from running full-force toward Jesus?

But weights aren’t the only thing we need to watch out for. We also need to scan for things that might trip us up.

Things That Ensnare Us

For the nation of Israel, “the sin that so easily ensnares” was unbelief. Unbelief may not be the besetting sin in your life like it was for the nation of Israel, but the truth is that we all have these. Everyone has something that they struggle with the most.

David, the “man after God’s own heart,” constantly sinned against God—and it cost him dearly. Sin does the same for us.

Sin dims the eye and clouds your spiritual vision
Sin deafens your hearing so that you cannot discern God’s voice
Sin dulls your taste so that you no longer hunger and thirst after God.

What sin is constantly pulling you back toward it that you need to lay at the foot of the cross?

The author of Hebrews implores us to identify both the weights that tie us down and the pitfalls that could trip us up and prepare for them beforehand so that as we run, we can do so with excellence. Draw near to God so that He can train you to run the race you’re already running well.

Originally posted on Replicate’s blog here. Used by permission.

The post Be Wise About Your Faith Journey appeared first on Discipleship.org.

Source: Be Wise About Your Faith Journey

The post Be Wise About Your Faith Journey appeared first on Passion for Planting.

Source: Leaders Need Grace Too

The post Leaders Need Grace Too appeared first on Passion for Planting.

Source: The Number One Killer Of Church Planters, Part 2

The post The Number One Killer Of Church Planters, Part 2 appeared first on Passion for Planting.

Source: 4 Ways to Show You’re Really ‘In Love’ with Your Spouse

The post 4 Ways to Show You’re Really ‘In Love’ with Your Spouse appeared first on Passion for Planting.

by Carey Nieuwhof: The longer I lead and the more I see, the more I’m convinced that character ultimately determines a leader’s true success.

Moral failure takes out more leaders than it should. But real success is deeper than just avoiding the ditch.

So where does the deepest level of leadership success come from? Ultimately it doesn’t come from a leader’s skill set; it comes from a leader’s character.

Your character determines your true capacity.

Why is that?

Character—far more than skill set—determines how deeply and passionately people follow you. A leader with character is a leader worth following.

A leader who lacks integrity may have followers, but he’ll never gain their full trust or their whole hearts.

After all, we all know highly skilled leaders who are never truly embraced; they’re merely tolerated.

Character, more than anything else, draws the hearts of people to your leadership.

The greatest leaders are highly skilled people whom other people love to be around. They’re people others admire, not just because they’re smart, but because they’re the kind of person other people want to become.

Lifetime success ultimately doesn’t come from a leader’s skill set; it comes from a leader’s character. Click To Tweet

So how do you know whether your character passes the test?

The greatest leaders I know navigate the following five things exceptionally well.

Before we get to those points, I’m excited to let you know that Highlands College is hosting a premiere leadership event called Impact Leadership Conference and members of my audience are invited. More details below, but here’s the direct link.

1. Handling Success Better Than They Handle Failure

Often people will ask you how you handled your last failure. And that’s not an entirely bad question.

Knowing how to handle failure well is essential to success in leadership.

But do you know what is harder?

How you handle success.

You would think success wouldn’t be harder, but it is, and I’ve seen far more leaders blow success than I have leaders blow failure.

Failure is, by nature, humiliating. It crushes pride.

Success does the opposite. It naturally inflates a leader’s pride. It’s intoxicating.

It takes both great self-awareness and great self-control to handle success, to not let the reports of your own brilliance or accomplishments go to your head.

The very best leaders remain humble, grounded and even self-deprecating. They don’t claim every perk of office and regularly help people who can’t help them back.

They avoid the gravitational pull of self-focus and, instead, stay focused on the mission before them and before everyone.

The ultimate test of a leader’s character is not failure, it’s success.

The ultimate test of a leader’s character is not failure, it’s success. Click To Tweet

2. A Willingness To Be Misunderstood

At some point, every leader will be misunderstood.

People will say things about you behind your back (or to your face) that aren’t true. People will judge your motives and get it wrong.

Sometimes you’ll only be allowed to say certain things in public, not because you’re being secretive, but because revealing all the information would make others look bad or would be breaking confidence. So instead, you look bad.

That’s just the territory of leadership.

Leadership is a bit like parenting. You have to do the right thing even if it’s not the popular thing. I’ve been there many times as a leader (and as a parent).

Great leaders have forged enough character to overcome the incessant desire to be liked. (Here are 3 hard but powerful truths about likability and leadership).

They are prepared to be misunderstood for a season, knowing that usually the truth comes out in the end.

And even if the truth doesn’t emerge in a particular instance, great leaders know that the overall track record of their leadership and character will speak for itself over time.

Leadership is like parenting. You have to do the right thing even if it’s not the popular thing. Click To Tweet

3. They Have The Same High Standards at Home As at Work

Success is intoxicating. And leadership is rewarding.

People generally do what you ask them to do. Results can be measured. And progress is steady. Sometimes it’s even exponential.

If only it was that easy to home.

Many leaders who are successes at work end up being failures at home, and that’s not success.

Many leaders who are successes at work end up being failures at home, and that’s not success.Click To Tweet

Your spouse isn’t impressed with your stats. Your kids don’t care about your awards.

They just need you.

They simply want you.

Too many leaders give their best at work and leave the leftovers for home. The best ones never do.

They pour the same energy and passion into their home life that they pour into their work life.

Too many leaders give their best at work and leave the leftovers for home. The best ones never do.Click To Tweet

4. Their Private Reality Matches Their Public Persona

300 interviews into my leadership podcast (you can subscribe for free here)  one of the top questions I get is “So what is ___________[insert the name of the well-known leader here] really like?”

The surprisingly good news is that most of the time, they’re actually wonderful, kind, humble, fully present and gracious, not to mention insightful.

I love it when someone’s private reality matches or exceeds their public persona.

That’s my hope for me personally too, and what it really boils down to is character.

Character is who you are when the spotlight’s not on you.

The best leaders are the same on stage or in the boardroom as they are in a private meeting.

They’re the same when they’re with one person as they are when they’re with a thousand.

And the truly great ones are the same when absolutely no one is around.

As John Wooden famously said, “The true test of a man’s character is what he does when no one is watching.”

The true test of a man’s character is what he does when no one is watching. – John Wooden Click To Tweet

5. A Willingness to Help People Who Can’t Help You Back

If you’re not careful, the more successful you become, the more likely you will be to spend time only with those who can help you get to the next stage of whatever you’re trying to do.

You almost naturally become a social climber.

The greatest leaders will resist this pull. It’s not that, they won’t spend time with other people who are as successful or more successful than they are. It’s that they will still spend time with people who aren’t.

The greatest leaders regularly find time to help people who can’t help them back.

And not just as a charity project…but because it’s just who they are.

They’re not so impressed by themselves that they can’t spend time with people who might not be impressed with them.

They’re not so caught up in what’s next that they can’t spend meaningful time with someone who isn’t on the same journey.

Sure…they’re still strategic with their time, but they have a deep sense of grounding that reminds them that life is indeed about others, not just about them.

The greatest leaders regularly help those who can’t return the favor. Click To Tweet

Want to become a leader worth following?

Dr. John Maxwell is definitely a leader so many business and church leaders have followed, and with great reason.

John’s teachings have influenced my leadership profoundly.

John’s hosting the Impact Leadership Conference on Wednesday, December 4th 2019, and you can attend in person or via live-stream.

You will hear from the voices that are shaping today’s leadership and business culture, Dr. John C. Maxwell, Simon Sinek, and Chris Hodges.

This action-packed, half-day event is guaranteed to provide the knowledge you need to increase your influence and make an eternal impact.

For the first year ever, the Impact Leadership Conference will be LIVE streamed. If you can’t travel to Birmingham, Alabama, you and your team can learn from these experts at your organization. Visit impactleader.com for more information on our streaming options.

You can also visit impactleader.com for more conference information, group rates, and to register.

What Would You Add?

The great leaders I know posses all five of these character traits.

What are you seeing? Is there another character trait you’d add to this list?

Scroll down and leave a comment!

The post 5 Things A Leader Worth Following Always Gets Right appeared first on CareyNieuwhof.com.

Source: 5 Things A Leader Worth Following Always Gets Right

The post 5 Things A Leader Worth Following Always Gets Right appeared first on Passion for Planting.

This post is by Jenni Catron. Jenni is Founder and CEO of The 4Sight Group and is a member of my  Speaking Team. You can book Jenni to consult with your team or speak at your next event here.

By Jenni Catron

Today’s leaders have the tools to grow things rapidly but lack the emotional and intellectual health to sustain it all.

And the fallout is killing us.

Our culture has minimized the responsibility and elevated the celebrity of leadership and with this I believe we’ve lost the realization that leadership is a sacred privilege.

Leaders have the power to change or affect the lives of others and therefore leadership is sacred work.

Leaders have the power to change or affect the lives of others and therefore leadership is sacred work.Click To Tweet

I hope you’ve been influenced by a great leader – someone who led by example with great character and integrity… someone who saw your potential and gave you opportunities to grow and learn.

And regrettably, I suspect you’ve also been influenced by a poor leader – someone who wielded their influence for their own power and advancement and maybe discouraged and demotivated you.

We need great leaders.

We need people who recognize the significance of their influence on others and are intentional to use that influence for good.

We need people who recognize the significance of their influence on others and are intentional to use that influence for good.Click To Tweet

To be completely honest, my early leadership journey was marked by a misunderstanding of what it really means to lead well. Following the path I had seen from others before me, I expeditiously climbed the corporate ladder, read all the leadership books, barked orders and bull-dozed my way to success.

That’s what I thought it meant to lead. But I soon realized I wasn’t having the influence I hoped for.

I was becoming increasingly aware that I needed a different set of skills for leadership. My problem was that I had a hard time keeping up with the rapid rate of growth and change required by my industry, so I was making leadership decisions that were more about my survival than they were about the welfare of my team or the organization.

I was watching my peers burn out at alarming rates because we were operating with a never-ending “get it done” mentality in a culture where hustle was the first priority. The lesson I was quickly learning was that my lasting impact was related to how well I was going to lead myself in the midst of the pressure I felt to perform.

My lasting impact was related to how well I was going to lead myself in the midst of the pressure I felt to perform.Click To Tweet

In fact, I remember one particular Saturday morning during that season. It should have been a relaxing day without a big agenda but I woke up a ball of stress torn between spending time with my family or using the time to catch up on the mountain of work lingering in my mind.

My husband picked up on my stress, so he asked, “What do you want to do, Jen?”

I thought it was a dumb question.  I didn’t have time to think about what I wanted.  I was leading a rapidly growing organization, overseeing a multi-million dollar building project and writing my first book.  There was no time to think about what I wanted. There was barely time to do everything I needed to do!

My husband’s question triggered an avalanche of emotions that took me months of counseling to crawl out of.  What emerged was a realization of how disconnected I had become from myself.

I was lacking self-awareness and it was impacting every area of my life.

Emotional Intelligence expert and psychologist, Daniel Goleman defines self-awareness as, “having a deep understanding of one’s emotions, strengths, weaknesses, needs, and drives.  People with strong self-awareness are neither overly critical nor unrealistically hopeful. Rather, they are honest – with themselves and with others.”

In that season of my life, I wasn’t being honest with myself or with others about my capacity and my limits.  As a result, instead of succeeding, which I was so desperately trying to do, I was floundering everywhere. My relationship with my husband was tense, I was short-tempered with my team, and time with friends was non-existent.

A crash-course in self-awareness opened my eyes to the importance of this topic.

I believe that self-awareness is the secret weapon of successful people.

I believe that self-awareness is the secret weapon of successful people.Click To Tweet

When we have a deep understanding of what is going on inside of us, we can be more conscious of how we impact others and therefore be more intentional in all we do.

My personal mantra has become, “lead yourself well to lead others better.” I can’t lead others to places I haven’t been to.

Lead yourself well to lead others better.Click To Tweet

1. Self-awareness is the strongest predictor of success.

A study by the organizational consulting firm, Green Peak Partners, and Cornell University examined 72 executives at public and private companies and found that “a high self-awareness score was the strongest predictor of overall success”.

The study also showed that while experience, confidence, ability to make tough decisions, and other so-called “hard skills” were important, the researchers concluded that self-awareness was the key differentiator for the most successful leaders.  “The executives most likely to deliver good bottom-line results are actually self-aware leaders who are especially good at working with individuals and in teams.”

Essentially, self-awareness equips us to work with others in a way that leads to results.

2. Self-awareness equips you to know where to focus.

Rewind to a younger you and I bet you had greater clarity about your passions and goals for life.

Fast-forward and layer on the complexity of work experience, family life, and increased responsibilities, and you’ve likely lost that same level of clarity.

When we are responding to all the “shoulds” that come at us, it seems we don’t have the luxury of knowing what we really want.

When we commit to being self-aware, we fight to stay connected to our core longings.

When we commit to being self-aware, we fight to stay connected to our core longings.Click To Tweet

We know our strengths and weaknesses, which equips us to know where to focus our growth efforts.  The tendency is to feel that this is selfish or self-focused, but the reality is that those we influence get our best engagement when we know ourselves well and are leaning into our strengths.

3. Self-awareness actually makes you less self-focused.

It sounds counter-intuitive, but the more self-aware we become the less self-focused we actually are.

The more self-aware we become the less self-focused we actually are.Click To Tweet

When we are self-aware we are more in touch with how we engage others and how they experience us.  We know when we’re under stress and are more likely to catch ourselves before we say that sarcastic comment or respond curtly.

The more self-aware we are the more in tune we will be to our emotions and how they are coming out through our actions.  We notice how we affect others and more deliberately consider what we need to do to act in a way that is considerate of others.

4. Self-awareness prevents you from doing irreparable damage to yourself and others.

Author Parker Palmer shares, “A leader is a person who must take special responsibility for what’s going on inside of himself or herself… lest the act of leadership create more harm than good.”

I’m guessing we don’t intend for our leadership to create more harm than good, but in the pursuit of more and better, we neglect some of our most important work.

Where does our journey of self-awareness begin?

Leadership coach, Beth Graybill, says there are three important steps of self-awareness:

1)    awareness of myself

2)    awareness of others

3)    awareness of how others experience themselves around me

Let’s look at these more closely:

Awareness of Myself:

Self-Awareness starts with self-observation. How well do I know myself? Do I know what I think, feel, and believe, and do I act in a way that is an accurate reflection of how people experience me?

Awareness of Others:

Self-Awareness increases with the observation of others. Do I know the people around me and do I understand how they will respond to interactions and conversations?

Awareness of How Others Experience Themselves Around Me:

This final stage involves paying attention to how others feel about themselves when they’re around me. Ask yourself, “Have I ever noticed how I make people feel about themselves around me?” Do you make people feel insecure or confident about their decisions? Do you make them feel empowered or apathetic about their choices? Do I make them feel creative or stifled with their projects?

When we lack self-awareness we miss the social cues that indicate others are walking on eggshells around us or are afraid to speak up.

Greater self-awareness helps you understand how others experience you and you are able to adjust your style to others rather than expecting them to adjust to you.

Ultimately, self-leadership is a journey. I journey that begins with a commitment to growing in your self-awareness and then embracing the behaviors of leading yourself well.

Self-awareness is an essential asset in living out your purpose with confidence.

Self-awareness is an essential asset in living out your purpose with confidence.Click To Tweet

When you have a clear understanding of who you are, what you value, and what you hope to achieve coupled with an awareness of your emotions and needs, you will engage others with an honesty and vulnerability that is contagious and compelling. That’s extraordinary leadership.

Self-Aware Leaders Develop Their Character

I have a new short video series where I share five habits that have helped me work on my character, covering everything from my morning routine to how to avoid moral compromise on the road when you’re away from your family and the people you care about.

These 5 habits are designed to help you build a better character that will help shape your legacy.

The 5 habits are:

An Intentional Morning/Evening Routine
Scheduled Rest
Password Sharing
Monitoring Your Public Talk
Rules for the Road

I would love to send you these 5 videos (for free).

You can sign up to receive them here!

What About You?

Where do you need to grow in self-awareness?

The post The Secret of Successful Leaders: 4 Reasons Self-Awareness is Essential for Leadership appeared first on CareyNieuwhof.com.

Source: The Secret of Successful Leaders: 4 Reasons Self-Awareness is Essential for Leadership

The post The Secret of Successful Leaders: 4 Reasons Self-Awareness is Essential for Leadership appeared first on Passion for Planting.